Past unpublished? unedited material. All Rights Reserved ~Derek Haimovitz
A taste of my creative process..
4/17/12
far past the oldest cities rusty soiled gates
beyond the farmers fields farrowed by countless days running in place
the forest trees extend their reach, reclaiming what we once took
as we build our shelves an write our books
we use the wood an rot the roots
no one looked so no one found
the answer within
without , around
----------------------
after awhile the mind starts to stop
after a spell the body will slowly rot
time wounds all of faiths heals
bliss in discomfort an all in between we will feel
the obvious reason why we are here
this an so much more
ineffable... the only word
the only word for sure
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we often defend the nay-sayers
an foolishly we encourage the trouble makers
with best intentions we talk ourselves numb
with all the things we have an have not done
our view of the sun fractured by our view through the sky
tidal forces rearranging all the wonderings of why
we drink until the well is dry
no more ways, too wet our lives
too many people too few supplies
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that mystic mountain top
between today an tomorrow
where our dreams may never stop
a separate spot from all the rest
a different place with different tests
what wonder has led us here
what lack of love has caused our fear
we walk a thin line
moving forward while falling behind
hoping to find what we already had
within the mind, the good an the bad
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4/16/12
you cant have all without everythingduality is an illusion all is the whole picturethe creation must be the way it is with great reasonsince thinking this iv tried to figure out what the reasons for things may be. albeit only a hall of mirrors to see clearer.if all is one i am everyone and everyone is mejust as i am every leaf of every treeand every pebble on every beachthese concepts seem a lil out of reachbut my faith i put to testits the only way i know to live with out regretsseeing life as lessons and tests
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and its no secrete... what lay before our open eyes.between the obvious lies and less clear illusions despite every bit of faith we are usingultimate confusion- and if our wonder ground to a halt
would we plunder the treasure of the vault?
the keys to the mind we found over time
turning the locks hoping to find
all the while drifting behind
our tongues tied in knots
my thoughts mixed in rhyme
where are we going?
where have i been?
what is the motion?
causing this spin..
-------------------------
may our dreams spirit our souls away not all us derelicts destine to stay in this earthly prison take heed of everything as if its a lessonwithout knowing we are bound to keep guessingour faithful progression forming our minds from what we find
whether mundane or divine
another saint of circumstance
in this great chaotic dance
no false moves, it flows as it should
its hard to fathom
the sound of silence is its anthem
that mystic void not empty at all
more then just empty space
between you and the wall
-------------------------
i said i like your style of knowing that something divine barely showingthe way we know without making it clearwhat more is to find while we are herebiding our time as our thoughts disappear
)_____________)
if my words did glowwould you seek to know their shineif they were a hand me downfrom someone else and not minewould you hear the words between the lineswould you hold it near as if it were divine
all you lose is all you find anyway
listen to the echo of the ripples
hear all the words the river doesnt say
it tickles the mind the answers to find that so often hide away
in plain view it is all you
the ripples distort the surface but the reflections still are true
its a long path without a guide
it can be a strange and wild ride
we have the ticket we did not buy
its our choice to sit or fly
always to drift in wonder?
i dont know dont really care
if i knew the way i would take you there
la da da da la la da da da da
la da da da la da da da
la la de da la la de da da
la la la la
la la la la
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why does my soul pine? from all the unanswered questions that roam my mindonly time will tell i know an i may only glimpse a part of that as well and i am lucky to view that before it becomes the past which is only relevant in liner form at that
it often feels as though iv been here before
it feels so familiar like theres always something more
something unexplained yet basic and unchanged
i always wonder how chance managed
to land me here with this star and planet
at this time and space
at this stage of the human race
what kind of chance would have such grace?
to land me here of all places
while in all the different faces i still see myself
i always wonder what can i do for the greater health
such a burden all the feelings out there
so many people its easier unaware
but the feelings are there
and i can not shut them off
only with faith can you make the hard soft
--------------------------------
4/11/12
i drove myself mad then found myself glad to be alive i then struggled harder then ever just to survive and was punsished on all sides till i managed to get away day by day and slowly build from what they took away now i stand another man rapt in awe so long stagnation set in... beginning again i slowly restart but still pines the echos the cries of my heart
=----
4/10/12
is the way ever clear?is it my choice to live here?in safety or fear..caught in all the pain i endure its not what i am living for but another mirror to see the perfection that be
all the reflections around me
lord sometimes it feels like im fixin to die
its only then i stop to question and wonder why
forced awareness through pains bareness
a victim of lifes deadly games?
am i at fault? am i to blame?
i know not the answers nor the lies
i have all the patience needed but not enough time
as the days roll by i change myself a bit
as the weeks go by i help where i see fit
days, weeks to months it goes like this
the price we pay for bliss on our way to heaven
the kingdoms luminescent gates of overlaying sevens
my life projecting lessons to learn
by way of accepting our freedom we earn
the trial of thorns paved with sorrows tears
we cross a bridge of awareness above an ocean of fear
the end is not clear but with faith we push ahead
after all a life spent living is better then a life living dead
lost in an endless sea of joy in miserythe tragedy of loving what slowly leavesour lives fragile leaves on the tree of timeare the roots all mine?i wonder what else lay under what we see and what we knowpatiently waiting i watch the seeds of truth grow
what is the meaning of this trial of thorns
what is the reason for the inherent scorn
the devil warns the lights too bright
my inner child's nervous fright
the path unknown not shown not walked its in our heads
we waste our lives by living them dead
following false idols in circles we are led
we must think for ourselves instead
without faith the way will never be found
as we are lost the world still spins round
dont seek to make senseof nonsense and ignorance our tolerance commands we judge only where WE standnot every other manas they judge themselves let go of judgments , for the common wealth
000000000000000000000
a spiral of infinity?no beginning nor an end is clear to seehow can this bethis life seems like a gift to mewhile other times a cursethe harder i try lately it seems to get worse
some unspeakable force plays a part
we make our decisions
while fate breaks our heart
each step in the cycle
faith lights our way through the dark
never give up on the love in your heart
by the mirror on the wallwe always knew we were one we were all but the reflection it never toldthe truth of the story of age oldall is reflection
we fit to our molds
our own to control
a duality reality
we project to unfold
the creative new lessons
the endless ways of infinite projection
all around to see
between the lines.. infinity
all the connections that we see
what is the meaning if its not all me
i see we all are
but why are all we
something strange and unrealsomething different i feelcreeping in the samelike any other regular sensation to my braina vibration, a notion a humbling sustain
hollowed with awareness i raise above the pain
my likeness the same of my maker i am
born again another one i stand
forgotten to remember all iv ever been
a remanent of ancient man
the offspring of never land
forever again found in a second of time
lost in the loops
inside my mind
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i watch the echos of the silent rainfalling on my window of physical painin this body thats only a part of me, holding mei see what may be becoming to bethe separate reality i always dreamed id seea utopia so hard to reach
a vision of a way of being so hard to teach
not my place to preach i weave stories instead
lines of rhymes to be sung or be read
a teacher cant teach without the students help
ways to make the masses learn to think only for themselves
----------------------
alabaster glint eyed lady, wearing rapt madness in disgrace wildly laughing mad man wearing the moon as his face..who could be of such gracethe carpet clouds lay low for now but not too near the lines of fear the garden empty
the signpost leers you better turn back
better then that you push forward
are you a seeker or an explorer
to walk before the second sky
to see the moon through closed eyes
feeling the stars from all sides
nothing else could be clear
all of light is and never disappears
the sun lit a smile on my face a saving grace in a time of painthe kind like solace in the coldest of rainmy spirit forlorn for love that burnspiping endlessly the words sound the samethe echo the answer my self is the blame
all along the path iv walked
those prints stay mine no matter how else i look
a leading domino iv always been
knock me down but i get up again
i cause what i bring
i am my own king my own master my own offspring
i am a nice guy when im thinking of being
but many mistakes along the way
so many mistakes theres no way to say
no way to write or type or transcribe all the hurt and painful lies
the sweetest eyes iv brought to tears
for what reason why? ignorance lust love greed and fear
is there any body that hasnt done similar here?
we all are human
why are we so harsh rather then so open
i see my father an i want to confide in him
i know we all have problems it baffles me why
nor what to do to fix the whole mess
i love us all and i try not to have regrets
iv learned my best from my mistakes
and every new one i make i try to change my stride
after all thats all i can really do
and thats all i would ask of you
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
how i wonder what words... would be fit?to describe the feelings, such as theseinescapable moments of tragedy the pain of seeing what time does to mewith best intentions i thought bad thoughtstime allowed awhile for the age old rot
i realized it but late enough to suffer some more
my spirit sleeping at the door
life tends to me i tend to it
my spirit free , my body sick
a complicated puzzle..
i am working to solve it
but it is so hard you see
wondering if every other is a reflection of me
it used to make me lonely
but i thought it selfish to think me the only
so i realized we all
were separate reflections of the same star
i wonder what exactly we are
sometimes i wonder a bit too far
all the while the pain surmounts
is it too late to heal?
i feel some doubt the way i feel
i get it, the message is really
iv learned my lessons of the past
i feel the pain today that lasts
i wish to move on and let us grow
the you in me i seek to know
broken from having a need for a fixi am sick of this constant paini want some numbing comfort for my brainthe nostalgic bliss that cold warm opium kissiv long sworn off the likes of thisbut all pains the same when it returns to remain
adding up and closing in
until discomfort is all thats been
stuck within my damaged being
still alive while barely breathing
all this pain still worth feeling
despite not seeing a reason for my life
i endure the pain and sacrifice
loving what i must let go
learning what i need to know
i take my time as though it were mine
it all slips away so fast
the pain of today will soon be the past
i quietly endure
knowing that less is better then more
--------------------------------
++++++++++++++++++++
whispering willows carry a soundless voice cross the plainsthe mountains hear the echothe thunder hears the raindo all these things hear me i wonder.. as i softly sighno one to ask if its the gods that thunderno one knows the wheres or whys
still i speak still i question
the meaningless answers fall down from the sky
and all the rain drops seek the sea
under the surface such density
its clear to me
theres so much more then meets the eyes
all of it with reason
it comes full circle between the lines
)_______________________________
i am a vibration rolling down the mountain siderushing through the valley down the rivers ripples through the water into the seai am all the fishall the water
all the land
i am just me
listening to allman brothers is absolute bliss with hash an coffee
but my cup is empty till tomorrow another time another chance
till tomorrow sweet dreams god speed my i glimpse another glance
_)_________
celebrity jargon all on tvthe lies and the secretes the next "new" big thingpropaganda the same no matter which side you are listening toanother distorted view only think for yourself to decide what is true
because no matter what anyone ever said
who knows what anyone ever knew
like knew for sure
we can only glimpse the visions beyond the minds door
but how do we describe the sights that do not meet the eyes
a greater meaning to all these things
its all a riddle im still solving
___________________
nothing never was anything at allthen what of me started building the wallsuspicions of all the people i meet an seeeven when i feel they are all meover thinking seems to be wildly prevalent like fish in the sea
such diversity
a meaning to grasp
with respect for the past
knowledge earned from lessons passed
forgiveness at last?
inevitably, becoming to be
_____________________
my sweetest tangerine , yearning for the honeydew taste of you i daydream myself in knotsenvisioning your soft brown auburn falling locks such gentle eyes as you softly sigh an look awaygracing your skin evokes feelings i know not how to sayit means the world
holding you tight around your curves
i cherish each breath i expend to caress your delicate form
you fuel the fire within me that burns
the eternal flame of desire illuminates my soul
in your beauty i see the meaning of getting old
an the value of being young
appreciating each hour we spend happy in the sun
i carry faith our saving grace
making the best of this place with such good company
isnt exactly all that hard when youre with me
and at the end of the day when i hold you in my arms it all goes away
the pain an madness an sadness gives way
to the warmth of love
that lights the way
_)_________________
our hope capsized an love surfaced from the tidesfor all the right reasons a brave sailor fishing outta seasonin the sands of time we stand as waves of uncertainty bury our planted feetsomeday tomorrow and today will finally meet till the sun rises in the west i may only suspect whats to comeafter all its all iv done thats led me here
not walking the plank on some lonely peir
but radiating, the warm love so near
no reason for fear in this life as i see it
even if its not truth i choose to believe it
we are all we are
an can only figure so far into the dark
the lessons there are the warmth of our heart
to be the light an shed the gloom
we the savior of our doom
_____________________
an if we all spoke in time,with humbled words of matching rhyme.would we communicate with the words unsaid?expressing ideas rather then describing their details insteadso much time is lost
exasperating ineffable thoughts
on down the rabbit hole as we do say
no matter how we try itd take forever and a day
if only there were an easier way...
for ideas to convey mutual realization is the only way
and till that day ill wander on
amusing the others with handmedown song
_______________________
3/21/12
my life spent forever in pleasure from the comfort mixed with pain an misery distrusting all the signs i see with faith within mei realize once more...carefully approaching i peered pass the door
and the sunlight spilled on my face
till the rain washed away, the winters silence was its voice
a dreadful slumber has tied we down
all are lost , none are found
hope resounds a reason for us being here
all is reflection
as a star may flash an disappear
another fraction of light somewhere else may appear
all a lesson for us to learn
the way can not be taught it must be earned
to discern the truth from all of the lies
we need to question why we cry
why we laugh , why we sigh
why we are living
why do we die
all of these questions we answer alone
at least until the truth to us is shown
-----------------------------------------
an i said to the moon who are you my blue dream? and the moon whispered "life's not as it seems," all of these stories you've found in your head.. all of the time, living an dead" lost in wonder from the words it had said
i recall all the words i had read of the days passed before.
all the people that had crossed through that door as the minds eye gaped.
truth always waits to show its face yet the truth is clear in the details always near.. without seeing them they disappear before our eyes.
distracted by propaganda's lucid ties to our souls..
how well they know how to take control. their power i fight,
i need no one to tell me wrong from right..
their rules built to uphold self truths..
may i be the wicked rebel.
id rather be of light then another commercial devil.
__________________________________________
not so lonely , being the onlynot much choice except all our seperate voicesoh no i say theres no way its all just us1 is too much
as they say
as i say no way
how lonely id be
being the only i see
thats the reason others be
what a selfish way to see
i think to ourself "me"
life is too magical too diverse id say
to see that it was oneness is true in some way
but there must be variety some fracture of the soul
to give so many molds , so many folds in the fabric of time
could it be one soul?
the shattered divine,
its all the good with all the bad
all youve wished for or ever had
the way of life
the pleasure in strife
all the things that keep us here
or feed our fear
never the victims of some mass appeal
our feelings surreal
no longer worth numbing enough not to feel
its all as should be an will be anyway
till theres tomorrow there is always today
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
fog as oily as the night drifts without soundforming images in ghastly lightfrom the farrow fields of grainto the highest mountains carried on a wind of changeour hope remains
the omnipresent
the past , the present
the future, an whats more?....
what lay in wait beyond the minds door
_______________________________
3/17/12
i beg of the raven winter, bring us comfort in the nightthe moons glow so heavy, waning from our sightdesert spring this time of yearapril showers rain dreams alleviate my painas my thoughts disappear reflecting on a world less then clear
what strange irony has landed me here
i question to myself almost every hour of each day
which inevitably slips away
without answer but only clues
which have no instruction of use
albeit all in my head
no one that follows is led
each choice is our own
even though the way may be shown
its up to us to step forward
or to digress or be progressive explorers
life is a whirlwind of change
all the while everything stays basically the same
_+++++++++++++++++++++++
3/16/12
spring from life the virgin flower..like a tattered bumble bee, rapt in the joy of the sun.never too distracted to keep busy living its short life on the run.on the fly im sure it often wonders why its doing what it doesat least i do.. just because
now is forever as far as the bee may know
likewise its all my reality really shows
here a moment, gone forever
for now im escaping the inevitable moment of never?
my thoughts however lead me to believe
everything is as it should be
perhaps possibly never neverever comes
we may just begin once we are done
but not the same life for everyone
rather an ever expanding varitey
like intricate patterns and their endless complexity
i wonder whats to be
perhaps destiny or whats meant to be
the fate for me
or free will at last
"how do i get there
without any path?"
the path not walked for its in your head
whats the use of life living it dead
i was sleeping all the time while awake
i was waking up to sighs of laughter in misery that made my soul shake
the voices were all me speaking to others out loud
fathers mothers sisters an brothers forgive and allow
the letting go the one that knows
reality shows a myriad of dis-ease
only to show us what loves us once pleased
karma our release
Complete all soul assignments before the next show
at least the voices are letting us know
its all in our heads
living or dead
learn your lessons an do your part
you are the light
you are the dark
__________________________
love it up, cosmic saviors.. cherish your delight. tend to the flame with the tinder of your sight. pay heed of omens leave faith for no man.. sometimes i cant even understand all the presures i withstand.. the power of love can mend any heart, penetrating light through the deepest dark. to our souls i pray, may we make peace with everyday.. making best use of our time remembering to remind, there are always more lessons here to find. our paths are our own but take heed of all the directions youre shown.. our faith is our own but listen so all ears may hear you in turn. the way of love is not scorn but gentle approach.. let divine love be thy coach. always thinking of what the other is feeling as if we all were all ourself.. pay mind to everything with a thought for the common health.
__________________________
Feelings unnamed of the soul untamed
do not shut this out,there is meaning for all that is here.have faith.. do not doubt,be calm.. do not in fear.always the question, why are we here?
we make our own meaning, while we are here
judging each other or judging ourselves
in the end it wont matter
poverty or wealth
whatever we feel
whoever we healed
whenever we kneeled an begged while we prayed
that it could all be okay
actually caring when we wished someone a good day
it never always was this way
so many distractions to keep our souls at bay
i hear them everyday
behind all the sheltered eyes an quiet smiles
inside everybody's inherent denials
an ineffable vastness of secretes in full bloom
cycles of life reflected on the moon
a terrible sadness mixed with gladness and joy
vaguely aware of something inexplicable and coy
knowing without knowing in this great chaotic dance
no longer do i wonder if it could all be explained as chance
seeing a fire of madness softly burning in my calm blue sea
realizing there is no separation between all the likes of me
_____________________________________________
a writers block invoked by pot
the kind that makes me sink , like water and a rock
a clouded mind mixed with pain
quiets the souls vibratory sustain
the words my wonder do sublime
through limiting stagnation that poisons the mind
thinking the paths are neverending
motionless here i am standing
at the crossroads inevitably again
i can barely recall
where i start and where i end
_____________________________
a block i find has crossed my mind
i found myself betwixt space an time
day by day i learn an grow
while the universe quietly shows
theres more to life
beyond our strife
our paper money an material paradises
without meaning
without feeling
awakened dreaming
perhaps in time this block will pass
as i know today will not last
only now i know for sure
thankful for what i have but as always i want more
_________________________
a lot of pain , a lot of pressure
from the darkness.. a light softly blooms
speaking too soon for all the right reasons
anticipating the changes unexpected of seasons
what merry men must hold behind
laughing smiles all the time
our grimaced flesh an worn polished teeth
ever so fragile in time
like the castles of youth we made by the beach
carrying stress in our jaws
rapt sober by laws
sickened by dis-ease
begging for comfort we plead
to the invisible god we need
while the visible falls to pieces
destruction inevitably the effect of creation the cause
begging while choosing our straws
painful pleasure our cup of tea
learn to take it peacefully
our sweet relief from within
its up to us its always been
hear all voices but speak thy own
reconsider all thats shown
forgetting to remember
remembering to learn
life is a process
our progress we earn
pay respect to how youve grown
it takes time for meaning to be shown
our patterned lives are stepping stones
whats to come from what begun
the earth the sun
a cosmic dance
just like you and i
our loves romance
_________________
an its been said he will call us up in the air
i take it as a metaphor for realizing what is there
what really matter to all of us here
why there is no reason to fear
why we walk the miles going no where
our love we must share
to remember the lonely wild old days
to realize its better living this way
loving the self an all others the same
from the divine source we all came
all of us follow our own path of change
for good or ill , we are to blame or thank
our own wisdom to rise from the depths where we sank
the common themes we go through in all of our dreams
all of the things.. great, big or small
likewise the spiral, rises an falls
together in all
we slowly unwind
finding ourselves again time after time
________________________
an old man in tatters came to me today..
he begged i listen to his words
said hear me when i say.. there is no dark like the day
our night light cities burn with life
for the light, ebb an flow we sacrificed
society names our price
our souls we sell for our idea of paradise
they control they will
their paper money brain wash spell
all the things they make us want
to distract us from what we are doing
as their abusing our lives as slaves
using us day by day
so far from gods way
consumerism the devils work some men say
raving madman in the dark of day
crying out to look in here
before what you cherish does disappear
never fear what will always come
thy will be started
thy will be done
ashes to ashes
dust to dust
did you need the cash that much?
________________
our radiant dandy
all strange order of monsters
we welcome you to our procession
what bring us now, to this trembling ground
what meets the ear, to disappear
the middle a circle, the beginning the end
what is the difference? the lives we defend..
the suspect the victim, self inflicted wounds to mend
for now truth is not clear
but i do not pretend
faith, my friend
forever, again
++++++++++++++++++++++
love unexpressed
my only regrets
how i bang against the walls
gazing through the barred windows
into their lonely halls
the curtain falls everytime our eyes meet
to their souls i beseech
a way of thinking i can not teach
a deeper meaning no words reach
the soul salvation i solemnly preach
may i.. say i.. love you a thousand times more?
would it penetrate the cracks in your door?
my friend, my sister, my brother, my mother
i call on you again.. look inside and discover.
the love of no other but the self will suffice
despite all else that we defend or sacrafice
always think twice or three times or four
whenever theres less believe that theres more
searching for a reason
making do each season
our love resounds with feeling
as the years are reeling
our lives of wakened dreaming
abstract meaning
day to night
night to day
seems its always been this way , if only here
the truth of it all someday will be clear
_)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
2/27/12
if it werent for the beauty there would be no valor in suffering
to grin at the sunrise despite what the night took
to dream while life is unbearable
there is something so perfect to it all
its the maze my mind constantly walks
circling 'round
the answer above an below
but never where my mind goes
into the unknown
new days with relative deja vus being shown
these thoughts that have grown
their seeds remain still
balancing the dark an light
as they forever will
__________
_________________
what can i say to you my friend
you've run down your own dead end
no where left to turn
besides every bridge you've prior burned
takes time to learn
lessons towards mending
no cause for defending , the self from the self
neglecting our health by wasting our time
forgetting theres a reason for every rhyme
reflections of yours are mine
no one else left to blame
only your lonely self
isolated, to change...
____________________
an ode to the quarter moon
around every light darkness looms
though up is also down
nothing is above nor below
nothing but what we do an where we go
oh silent night i love thee so
all of the wonder that passes so slow
days reflecting like never before
the light i experienced beyond the door
seeking to be, seeking to see.. as much as i do believe
and so much more
the futures always close
the meaning seems too far
searching for a rhyme to the riddle
while the piper plays the fiddle
to a tune no man can hear
but only feel
not with a dream nor a whisper
or a mystic spell
to reach heaven you have to cross hell
and my loved ones, i wish us well
may our love dispel hate
may we have patience to wait and faith to push on
together we are strong
moraltiy automaticly sorted (right from wrong)
gods love is true as god loves you
for this reason thou Should love thyself
just as well
we are all in this thing together
you are myself that i know better
reflections get their meanings across
its up to us..
which to keep , which to toss
________________
show me an answer an ill draw you the question,
all our wonder to keep us still guessing?
thoughts of heaven
memories of hell
such is the life iv come to know well
the chance mystery
a blessing from unknown
for this reason i am patient for truth to be shown
all that wonder forbids and allows
the unknown whispering too loud
there an then , here an now
____
all is reflection with a reason
every scene we are seeing a deeper meaning
another myself, what cause for our being?
i wonder with such feeling...
awake in my eternal dreaming
every lesson to learn , finding my soul in others eyes
all the fuels that'v been burned.. by the fires of our desire's
__
so it seems to me
we might just have to believe, in dreams
maybe life is not just what it seems
i believe.. but im not sure what to believe in, again
i find myself telling myself not to let myself pretend , again
i know i have to feel it from within
iv been where ever for as long as never
return to sender
PS. my soul of we
a long lost memory of being to be
a drop in the sea
a crystal key to the palace
reminiscent of VALIS
i try not to distract my mind from the facts
when nothing is proof nothing is truth
all things are false as time ticks away
the inevitable days as chemistry ensues
laying in my biomachine iv damaged and abused
scars lasting lessons
the suffering pain doorways to heaven
the keys to the kingdom handed down the line
father of mine reflections of time
the seeds that were silent all burst into bloom an decay
feeding the earth for seeds to thrive other days
the circles of time remind theres no other way
hard to have everything without all anyway
all things with reason
a hope for each season
moving forward getting past
from the start to the last
the present mystery of the past
the moment changes life rearranges
an i pause to wonder once more
anxious approaching i creep towards the door
quiet i knock then turn key to the lock
throwing the windows open wide
circle rings in the sands of time
the doorway illuminates a silent lesson
all our wonder, to keep us guessing
___________
well my friend all we are is a picture in a mirror
times lines on our faces showing clearer
for all our worry theres no hold on our freedom
inevitably sometimes we just need to see things
an i know theres always a reason
beyond those false lives we believe in
i knew the stories told long time ago
i heard your voices flow from where i do not know
its a wild road an we gotta keep seeking
cant stop an wait enough to embrace the feeling
the winter changes by the time spring rearranges
our seeds we maintenced as our spirits flourished
our bodies machines for our souls fatal voyage
living the life betwixt the minds maze
perceiving reality by some touch of grace
pain an pleasure
learning as we go , protecting by building defenses
walkin away from ways we used to know
we tear down the walls we built up to hide scars
Open the Door
let your love in
always be seeking the peace from within
not living without
we love but not to let go
we love what we get to know
the moment of never
eventually we will get there
the time of becoming
give up our jaded ways
an stop our endless running
our ways of numbing as diverse as our minds
receiving radios for the divine
recalling the times of being before
seeing the light glowing beyond the minds door
i symbolize the key
becoming to be
reaching inside hoping to find
what was left was right all the time
your love is mine
its a handmedown the thoughts are broken
for what its wroth i offer this token
blessing of light
i rise to the sun an bow to the night
for our love i write
namaste my friend, its good to see you again
you thought that i had run away
before the mirror here il stay
the voices quietly say its all in my head
im living im dead
theres no reason to fear
its all a gift to be here
in the only an the only
keepin the self from being lonely
loving the one
the many rays reflecting from the sun on the moons brilliant face
our satalite echoes our phases
gravitational pulls on the tides of all oceans to all nations
all one on all
the planet earth
a mission of becoming
to test our souls worth
enduring the strife
embracing sacrafice
for the love of all one
helpiing the others for karmas return
it takes time to burn
entrophy a lesson to learn
appreciating the fleeting
we give thanks for our being
we give thanks for our feeling
we give thanks for our breathing
we give thanks for our hearing
the air the trees the soft sweet smells sights and sounds
the beauty that surrounds
the light in the dark
the dark in the light
all of the things that cause wrong from right
a balance to all
a hole in the wall
if we can not seek , how do we hear the calling
how to motivate the stalling
every problem not worth solving
simplicity the key to the game
living believing in truth
while there never is any proof
faith is acceptance at best
life not for living full of regrets
but trying our best
stoping to clean up all of our mess
doing to do
loving true reflections of you
___________
the narrow way
a steep incline
quickly we fall
slowly we climb
pushing furthur
hoping to find
whatever mystic left us behind
while i couldnt ask for better
appreciating the weather
the falls on me but i dont mind when it feels fine
a greener hill beyond the mountain yonder
a better future to ponder
how i wander as im still
should i wonder? as i will
truly a sight to see
becoming, to be
_+++_+_+__
society you sicken me
a travesty to see
the imperfections we let be
a part of the.. undefinable quality of harmony
our perils glee
desperately free
wondering whats to be
all the while making it so|
as we are, letting go
______
sometimes it makes no sense to cross tolerance with ignorance
a common defense, the love of the soul
being young and getting old
seeking control over life
once or twice sacrificing for paradise
the cost of the price
7 billion to 1
the son of the sun
heaven help me
dear lord i pray
give me the strength to face the day
i try my best to endure the tests
giving my love to the rest of the flock
i vow i will not stop an give up the good fight
i know your light will return me through any night
iv been sworn to this battle long ago
resisting thought control
with thou on my side never again will i let my light hide
surrender the titles of false overgrown idols
let go control of far diminished limiting molds
anticipation of growing old gives way to lamenting youth
seeking truth exposes the lies
relinquishing doubts by opening eyes
we pretend to realize
all good things in all good time
yours is mine...
_
+++++++++++++_)((O*&(&UH
2/2/12
whisky, beer, bourbon an rum
hashish, blue dream, afghani
bubbling bong
yearning not to be numb
but as high as the sun
shining all one
bid the sun rise
wipe off shadows from your sleep
wash your loving hair by the creek of becoming
thinking of something
far beyond the minds of men
the likes from which we descended
as we are mending
the separate sides back to one
the love of the sun
always shining bright
even in the dark stillness of the longest cold winter night
second sight fading fast
back to daily life as long as my living may last
______________________________
))1/31/12
token delight
seasoned by timeless night
the spirit soars
wanting of more...
the wide eyed believer
closing eyes to see clearer
straight through our sorrow,
our self induced darkened hollow
far beyond deceiving sacrifice,
the price of life
never falter when youre weary
future scary when there is no comfort here
no way out clear
the ultimatum prison cell
saturn ascends
choose one or ten
saturn ascends
hang on or be humbled again
__
1/30/12
what is it i want
a new comfort that cant be bought
that cant be taught
what cant be learned
must be earned
skill not a given
hope the key to wisdom
patiently entering the kingdom
as ever slowly becoming
the something from nothin
_________________
rooted i am
stoned with the earth..
in stillness truth rings sublime
my voice echos through the canyons of my mind
all things lost in due time
all things gifted
everythings fine
everything i must witness
gods forgiveness
a chance remittance
from the stars on far
our love await
at dawns gates the sun sets a golden jewel in the sky
so as the sun goes down i say find yourself
find yourself today
an tell me i said high
time to die to live again
to pretend were here to mend the two sides
while we hide behind covers of another
the truth to discover theres no separation
though all we see is you is me
but we are still apart asleep awake alight in the cold dark ...
i so often wonder whats the reason
with the pass of each season my need to know lessens bit by bit
as i learn to let live and appreciate it
i feel true freedom the likes of which before i had only seen within
_______________
miles of wild trees
undisturbed by the likes of these
folks that build roads
seeking more control
by the lonely darkside of the road...
these trees grow old
watching on in silent disbelief
oh what we do to their fellow trees..
their rotted leaves litter the ground
all the fresh green left farrow brown
without a sound i hear their cry
with them in wonder
i ponder , why.. why.. why?
_________
the silent gates past the aether
the cosmic receiver in tune with the believer
a sense of knowing whats see through
a window growing to peer through
to see whats true
me is you as you are I, separation the age old lie
truth hides , within blind faith... truth waits,
for no man to understand
a plan a reason
beyond seeing beyond awake
not dreaming
for what is lost, is all thats found
dust to dust on scattered ground
love resounds
_______
1/29/12
when the creator is the created in the creation
whats the reason whats the cause
light an love
falling stars
birth an death.. you might recall all the rest
big bang ... black hole
starting over... getting old
as each star will form and die
clouds like ripples in the sky
water flowing .. ancient omen
spring summer fall .. winter come round for all
again and again
feel the earth spin
another rock in the sky
another vessel for you and I
how many times have we been here before
let love in
open the doors
____________
1/26/12
we are nowhere , and it is now
now where are we?
somewhere else that started it all over
some far flung off spring of a species of planet rovers
in the genetics hides omens
our history sorted at best
somehow we survived all the tests
our forms not like the rest of the animals here to adorn our beautiful world
may be we are meant to explore and learn more
may be we are the ones we are looking for
perhaps the light is ourself beyond the minds door
what's this life for?
why do i wonder.. as time slips away
why do i question though i feel blessed for each day
may be i made it this way
may be it always has been
if i am not without
then i am not within
(wondering more this morning on the origins of man
seems far older then the planet earth and influenced to say the least
for what its worth it feels to me that whatever we are we predate the earth and that we just happen to be here now.. like seeds planted that grew. that as its too much improbability to wrap my head around.. speaking of probability in such an improbable world though is laughable to say the least. my yearning to know the truth tells me eventually inevitably somehow i/we will know
till then i can only wonder :) )
________
1/23/12
what radiant jewels adorn the night
the days bright clamor obscures their sight
their soul takes flight as eve draws near
where the days harsh lines do disappear
drifting off to sleep, absolved by the peace of inner wealth
the cosmic self nurtures an refines
the challenging lessons remind of all the answers we find in endless reflection
such divine perfection must be at work
i have faith in my lifes worth
a grand plan much bigger then i am
yet i know i am equal to the whole
i resolved not to have to know
but have faith
love an let love an let go
all with much love
ya know
______________
all about with reason
all along the line
everything im seeing
seems to come in due time
everything lasts while everythings leaving
like the seasons
our selves the trees
our lives the leaves
and we shed to remain
we stay the same to change
from the cycles we are made
our failures saved
our hopes realized
always truth and never lies
we compromise to live in zen
letting light in as much as dark will allow
forgetting how to control the tide
refuse to hide
from the others torment
the rampant storm that pervades the mind
lessons in rhyme all with great meaning
everything fleeting
as all that we cherish is leaving
we breathe through our health
watching the unwinding of our timeless cosmic self
)))))))))))))))))))))))))
what dreams may wait
beyond the side of the sunlit hills
an echo of a distant voice
through the window on the wall
the air hangs heavy an light
a feeling of surrealy being not there
knowingly unknowing
unfathomably aware
it just has a feeling a sense of completion
singularity still has me reeling as i approach the calm center
the beginning of never
how our fate echoes the weather
the rain in decemember clearing away
the snow falls so perfect remarking the day
the hush of winter falls with the snow keeping noises at bay
in this stillness the voices within us speak up so loud
soundlessly they resound
speaking of all the times we have been before
all the times we stepped through the door
the memories flood back
knowing beyond facts
faith now replaced
caught in rapture awe struck our saving grace
life not a race
but a study we cant replace
time wont wait but happen again
our destructive creator were slowly spiraling in
our ultimate fate lays far away
but time has no meaning lost in this reeling
still the cause im seeing of our being
is our ultimate end as well
the singularity that birthed us our universes fate as well
a black hole the big bang
its happened before itll happen again
forever an ever
spiraling in
____________________
1/15/12 Talez of becoming , something from nothin
wild eyed salty sea beast , jackoroses salior saint an judas christ
the keeper of the black wings of the north wood, the student of the night
telling stories of olden wisdom an what his sails were set for
the lessons from the kingdom an other vistas he explored
we are summoned to the night
we are greeted by the dawn
the time of becoming
something from nothing before too long
the forests echo with laughter of our forefathers that cometh before
passion overtaking emotions as we peer through the door
yesterdays tomorrows becoming todays
cycles of becoming going back before years months an days
the talez of the ole ways
while the story teller speaks
we dream of what he tries to teach
his joy is to share light , an not disaster
_____________
its already overthough its only beguncaught in singularity spiraling towards all one backwards from where we started fromback to the end to begin again
lingering on the event horizon forever within a dream of not knowing
yet growing and dying and multiplying
swinging on the spiral of infinity denials of living a dream
reality not as it seems but so much more
glimmering the light beyond the minds door
_____________
In the Quiet abandon The Child has grownLessons of ReturningWhere ever he wanders is homeDestine to roam
Searching each Road
The answers are close
But always Furthur behind
Peering through the veil
Searching to find
Rhymes of riddles
memories beyond time...
Whatever it all is
It feels like its all mine
_______
1/15/12
Dream-So here we are..Life or something like itEmbrace or fight itTake the key
Open the doors
Less of what youre wanting
More of what you deserve
Answer-less are many
While the answers are aplenty
Its all in our head
The devils an the gods
The living and the dead
No separation but unity instead
So whats this mean?
Some odd dream....
Awoke by distant thunder
In the back of my mind i whisper "no wonder"
)____________________
1/09/12
stop making sensefor the sake of toleranceignorance a comforting numbing blissa blanket of ticks atrophy of control letting go of letting go
seeking to know
hoping to find
nowhere reminds of somewhere divine
somehow i am thine as thine is mine
my own images i behold
far more then meets the eyes of my mold
my body young to old
like all the lives iv lived before
opening and closing the door
spared the suns grace from the window on the wall above my fireplace
i light my own way
with the words i write i say
what all can not be said nor directly read
the meaning between the lines
i form the words
but the rhymes are not mine
____________
1/11/12
tell me your dreams
an ill write you a letter of my fantasy
post script full of my memories of never
paint me a picture of sounds without noise
tell me the colours with your soundless sweet voice
feeling theres no choice
i beg ye forgive my impatience
i meditate to thy greatness i honor thee
seeking to know we cut up the lines
constricting our minds
so tied up within
we always have been
on the path of knowing
nothing for sure is showing
but we take step in stride
keep moving or be left behind
cycles remind of progression designed to keep us to the path
distractions never last
the truth we must face to pass
life a test we pay to play
what you die from tomorrow you learn from today
thats just the way it goes
once you got it figured
its time to go
___________
1/10/12
more, i adore
less is not enough for what i desire
i need more fuel
more fuel for the fire
let it burn let it burn
i want to use all the fuel
let it burn higher
more is what i adore
always looking for some
more is better then one
_-_____-__--_-____1/09/12
take the dose as a toast to pry your minds eye to see through the lies the ego speaks too much thinks its tough silly human life gets rough when you think the peaks the top your bound to hit the rock bottom to again start from nothing we the something the seeds that grow seeking to know we push closer too the light till its glow is too bright we start to lose control if we cant escape its sight such burning vision stinging clear all the truth we somehow fear when it is the calling we need to hear THATS why we are here! no reason to fear but such acceptance forced upon us.. sense of knowing can only dumb us for once we know we let go of learning our wheels stop turning.. do not know just say maybe possibly probably so is the way things go... after all how much can you really know.. only what you BELIEVE shows an what it means is what we make of it till we know for sure its either we are making it or faking it but all with reason all the hours all the close calls we devour without another thought.. all the false idols we have treasured and sought.. ourselves running from ourselves all along while learning to be strong by yearning to be weak how many left turns turned the wrong way have we went down to seek the right way of being awake but still dreaming alive in our feeling but not much beyond our bubble of our mold.. the material we need as much as we need to let go.. lessons to know, like all things.. more of the same difference realities cycles brings
----------------------
just say maybe
ya cant always know
accept what you see
consider what doesnt show
let go an drop control to see
things from another perspective possibly
eventually
probably
just exactly what we need to see
to let us become what were supposed to be
a drop in the sea
the tide turns the sands away
every minute is every day
every hour that ever was
always is an always will be
as confusing as this may seem
our life may as well be the dream
as real as it seems
becoming to be
___________
there aint no easy answers
but its all simple in hindsight
whats wrong teaching whats right
all the memories running together
scent taste an sight
time let me know better
but not whether its all wrong or right
beyond our life living doesnt stop
knowing so much more beyond shows
we can only accept feel blessed an let go
_____
-got what i asked for , just as i needed
a message the meaning worth heeding
regardless of my reasons of not believing
my sleep waken deadalive dreaming
beginnings to end
foes to friend
wounds to mend
time is healing, if we tend its feeling
doesnt hurt? give it awhile..
eventually denials are overcome with pains disdain
lifes not the same
when all the horror you sought to escape
is your own future an your out of time to wait
______________
i shoulda seen this coming
when i did but didnt, i had no clue
you never do.. what always does?
no one was what no one is
their own existence
the painful bliss
the secrete is
its not you thats me
when there is no separation that our lives let be
a travesty of majesty our perils glee
its not you thats me
how we wonder why are we here
nothing to fear
knowing reminds
you lose things to find
the truth rings sublime
your answer to call
your memories start it all
up against the wall , feelings that cool skin
remembering all iv ever been
all my deeds an sins i bless them too
figuring somethings you just never get used to
now i know better, from the times i didnt weather
to see the change that i know like my name
its never the same but it always is
a treacherous adventure
a token of bliss
_______
I want to hear the sound
not just the hushed waves
I want to open the chasm
not just watch the surface craze
_______________
OPEN the door
jumping through again an again to find my self everytime within
??
at the quiet gates of abandon
stood alone before time knew its name
Cosmos dance
A Drop in the Sea , ENDLESS spiral of infinity
Triangles where each side faces the sun
___________
all the times lost prophets
what have they found?
grave dust an a eulogy.. where their hope may resound.
a dream of a dream of remembering what it was
that started us , that parted us..
as if appearing from above.
forces shove to control each side
though each man hide
behind the cover of another
while ones still the other
no ones left to part
this disturbed him greatly
from the light he stole the dark
_________
ointo the void the lesson of knowing faith in the faithless inevitably growing from every lie fractured the light of truth showing
in a life led faithless we are the faceless no matter the meaning if we cant believe what we are seeing
wondering wisdom struck from divine once again its myself that i find in all of our forms all the times i have died and been born in my mind storming in rhyme
formulate denials for the apparent ordeal never knowing why thats just how i feel can we slow the passing of time can i mend your heart with mine
My boots as dusty as this soul..
For all the memories, my footsteps hold
__________
you can feel it in a winter breeze an see it in the leaves of the summer trees just like another part of me.. ya know its callin but you dont know why a certain something just seemed to catch your eye got you mesmerized... future crawlin outta the days that passed the ones that couldnt last seemed to fade fast, an all the years are rolling into one an all i ever have an havent done, like the moon an sun reflecting light on an on..
_)))))))))))))))))
always again myself that I find
are all our reflections mine?
not our bodies nor our faces
that look in the pupils of far off other places
that mystic shadow on which light just sheens
pools of blackness where all our sights gleamed
radiant jewels adorn our pupils worn like open portals in our eyes
showing so plainly what they do hide
deep in that mystery our true self yet to find
_____
¼/12
love is life
as life is love
love is power
as love is light
light is powerful
as light dispels darkness
darkness chases light
as death wanes life
life waxes death
draining the life we love more and more
just as our affections we adore
a deeper meaning for the separate reflections
to come together to realize divine perfection
our souls oppression
through love our projection grows clearer each day
through all our trials we learn the way
loving the self
realizing our wealth
giving unto others as if they were us
doing things only that are morally just
love is trust
trust in life and trust in god
today's lovers tomorrows fathers and moms
______
only the senseless wouldnt make themselves an would rather be made by somebody else instead.. even if its all in their head, theyd imagine them selves alive but just as well off dead, controlled an forcefed.. its really no use wondering truth when there never is proof in any of this
life's fleeting pain in bliss
a drop in the ocean
a rift in the void
i stand without motion caught in the rain
considering myself alive but insane
________________
12/30/11
so many so many so many people to keep up with
what a world we live in all the connections you make everyday alone
every single self shown and all intertwined
reconnecting to remind
never was a time we were not apart of the cycle
where are all those words to start it all over
remember when 10 dollars showed you the universe?
in my day we had to rhyme in riddles till we knew
now it comes to you
has always been
never was a never before
untill there never was a never before
or how else may it be
apart from probably
something has to give
an we always feel sorry for the horriblebankruptcy attorneysthatblewitupscreweduptheworldforinsuancepolicies
the truth that never was heard
nobody knew thats what the world did till we put it all together
now we see it better but how many truly see
what is sight beyond seeing
what is knowing beyond being
hearing when there is no apparent call though its felt within us all\
something small becomes something great
a gleaming shore a windswept lake
____________
my raging pupils i beg you quiet their silent sustain
they constantly call to me throughout all my change
always to remain, so silent i adore them as they call to me the same
every fleeting reflection bearing my name
to the soul my reflection coos I AM
even when i deviate from the path it all goes to plan
my feet planted in the sand as the tides shift my stance
my sorrow fear love an wonder alone in my mind,
while the cosmos have no pause from their dance
may each day be my only chance i try the best i can
an somehow i tell myself it matters
even if i am only a man
)))))))))))))
i wanna do what i do
ya know i do it for me
though i do it for us
i know i do it for me..
i want to feel free to take a dive into ecstasy,
away from me, by moving closer to see.. what all will be, eventually..
A separate drop of an infinite sea of divinity..
our equality equates to never having to wait
but always having time to find what really matters..
what was lost? what was gathered?
does it matter?
no more lines..
the words as old as all of the rhymes
)))))))))))))))
of all these thoughts exploding through doors,
i often wonder if less is more.. what is life for?
the never ending circling of our southward deadend highway of mending..
no cause defending our merit in life, we all face our personal sacrafices..
to break doubts ice, hopes fire must burn..
dont let it die with each turn of the wheel
I try to hold on try to stay strong as i let go
i am seeking to know as i let it be..
appreciating all around me while not wanting the wanting but wanting of more
though i adore all iv found as its all iv looked for..
alas i always want more, calming myself i hold tight on my reigns
so much of life changes by staying the same
all in due time nothing remains..
as it goes all a part of the game i am so glad i play,
no matter what im thankful of each god given day.
________________
I want to push the limits
I want to bend the lines
I want to take the dose to redefine my mind
Drifting through my lessons to find the way to remind
Of all those days that slipped away so fast
I want to make that wonder last
the wonder lust
For all the wonder i pay the cost
Wandering lost as i am found
Hope resounds a deep meaning
Everything seeming connected like the seasons
Though i may only be dreaming
Still i appreciate the feelings
))))))))))))))))))))
12/22/11
outside a warning the morning the dawn.. inside im yearing disturbing the right in the wrong. the fatal storm breaking to calm, the clouds making way for the light of the sun. inside all one there is no other, each self is another you and me mother and brother the father divine.. the spiral of light, higher we climb.. your love is mine
________________
12/21/11
you dug your grave, your soul to save.. its no better no matter where you lay. here to stay so make the best of it. theres no rest from it, the eternal struggle.. onward we muddle for the riches our souls sickness the wanting of more.. the more we adore when we hold plenty, the loss of many on the road of becoming.. slowly we climb the something from nothing
___
12/20/11
any time now youll wake up
its all real because nothing is
everything is because it isnt
it was all a mistake anyway
lets do it again
~
can we go back?
have you been born yet and are you alive
how did we get here?
where are we going? ... to the other side of morning
all things promised
all things missing
are we only entitled to what we are given
is surviving living
what is life without sacrifice
nothing is free if we always pay the price
thinking twice of every conceived notion
in my thoughts breed omens
and once dreamed reality wasnt as it seemed
pandora's box opened as i gleamed
a golden hall adorned with crystals
granite and pearl inlaid walls
a hallowed space
looking in the mirror
my worn face stares back at me
an older version gazing at the younger me
becoming just to be
__
Words i do wonder, lines i do rhyme
Building ideals in symbols and signs.
Ways to remind of left behind knowledge,
The starting of stopping, something from nothing...
The cycle remains while everything changes by staying the same.
Life's game we play again and again with new names
It's never the same and it always is a trial of bliss
The grace of gods kiss still fresh on our unknowing lips
From the well we do sip the waters of becoming
As we learned crawling an running all things advance in due time
Our romance does remind of the love and intention that birthed mankind
Our perfect design the vehicle for our souls obsession
Our blessing of not knowing always to keep us still guessing
----------------
it takes alot to take alot
though alot is all you got
whether you know it or not
it doesnt stop it doesnt start
with every beat of every heart
and every gasp of every breath
the cosmic self
the omni present
the pits of hell
the kingdom of heaven
7 11 44 13
what does it all mean
duality some kind of dream
the yin the yang were caught up somewhere in between
an when realize
an see without eyes
they say thats where zen lays
_)))))))))))))))))))))))
12/16/11
all about with reason
all along the line
everything im seeing
seems to come in due time
everything lasts while everythings leaving
like the seasons
our selves the trees
our lives the leaves
and we shed to remain
we stay the same to change
from the cycles we are made
our failures saved
our hopes realized
always truth and never lies
we compromise to live in zen
letting light in as much as dark will allow
forgetting how to control the tide
refuse to hide
from the others torment
the rampant storm that pervades the mind
lessons in rhyme all with great meaning
everything fleeting
as all that we cherish is leaving
we breathe through our health
watching the unwinding of our timeless cosmic self
____________
12/12/11
wondering of whats to come
I want to believe times not done
realizing its all one
no end nor a beginning of the line
living through clockwise the circle of time
knowing this am I too far ahead or running behind
always again myself that I find
are all our reflections mine?
not our bodies nor our faces
that look in the pupils of far off other places
that mystic shadow on which light just sheens
pools of blackness where all our sights gleamed
radiant jewels adorn our pupils worn like open portals in our eyes
showing so plainly what they do hide
deep in that mystery our true self yet to find
___
(random incomplete bits)
when all our eyes realize
in the end
we count our foes as we count our friends
Keep in mind the good an bad we did defend
an see the light in what we could not mend
+-
I went out late one night
the winter moon shining bright
walkin down beside the road
nowhere to go I cant go home
iv been this way a thousand times
my way back I can never find
one missed step, your sure to fall
when your down who hears you call
WEST by EAST
NORTH by SOUTH
No matter where the compass point
no matter how things seem disjointed
an there was a town
drugged up and run down
no one stayed out past night
an everyone there seemed to fight
an where is that place I used to know
where the cool calm waters always flowed
its dried up here on the coldest night of the year
___
Nirvana-
What else could I see?
all a part of me…
why cant you show me something else?
something beyond myself…
in the sun, in the sun
we are all one…
forever looking for the projection of our reflected lives
always we pay the price
inevitably the constant sacrifice our love lives and possessions
Hey, Wait,
how do we cherish what is fleeting
Hey, Wait,
how do we keep hold of what is leaving
___
12/12/11
(think i wrote this to queen jane approximately)
Wandering about without dreaming
touching each other without feeling
all the people saying words no voices ever said
lines from the books no eyes have ever read
an I guess its all they ever told you
an its just the way everyone tries to control you
well your tired of their rules an all of your creation
wont you consider how things change
wont you consider how things change
it cant always be just the way they want it to be
with all this endless possibility
there aint nothing stopping me or you
from doin anything we want to
+___
in our madness we reach sublime
to the light we crawl and climb
when our sorrow fills us with doubt
its up to faith to cast those doubts out
through another electric night
our spirits race to reach the sights
that lonely tower inside we dwell
past heavens gates an pits of hell
a separate place beyond such grace
the observatory of the soul
looking out as we grow old
into our timelessness of being
finally truly seeing
life is above believing
living is whatever we are feeling
but all with great meaning
awake in our dreaming
Down on luck an ailing, just as troubled as could be
I went down to the devil wondering just to see
he said I can help you out my friend, I swear your just like me
you can have anything you want an be anything you want to be
all I ask of you my boy is only all you are
that whiskey drinkin demon is tempting
but you better off take ware
sell your soul an all those earthly riches someday you will not care to hold
an then you will find all that money you got to hold cant fill up the hole
of your precious soul you so foolishly let go
____
Rivers an trees, Like the fractals of the leaves
Fingers reaching further
Flowers growing higher
Toward the one our sun
Many the path from the one
Diverging upwards towards the sun
Entwining we climb
Perplexing through time
Living life divine
Many the lives with our own is entwined
A constant presence
A cosmic essence
We are Star~Dust, We are Golden, We are billion year old Carbon!
An we got to get ourselves back to the Gar~Eden!
__
Desolation Row-
while calypso singers flirt with sailors
making light of their far gone memories..
they lure em in with the sweet songs they sing,
when they ought to let them be
except for the romance enthused
who traded everything one could lose
just to prove love was true
an it alone was enough to use
now the seeker the found
an all the whirlwinds pushing down
on the outskirts of freedoms den again
an i dont know why we have to cry or sing
it is all as it should be
we are all in good company
no ones perfect we're all the same
no ones at fault no ones to blame
pay mind to what you choose
cherish what you use
nothings promised nothing remains
in time we will lose all we gain
its just another circular street
an another stoned deadbeat
so practice what you preach
what cant be learned you cant teach
watching the sun go down
feeling the earth spin round
hearing without sound
seeing what cant be found
now is the time that always has been
now is the way it all is within
so this is the song that i sing
this is the message i bring
always look out by looking in
)))))
12/08/11
awaking from a sigh..
viewing the mirror,
i wonder why.
gazing into my own eyes,
immortal reflection.
my pupils hollow reflection of a deeper truth
keeping my faith with no shred of proof
i settle for knowingly not knowing
with no reason showing
i live my life of sacrafice
giving my love to soothe all our strife
i cherish the pain and sadness the same as the joys in life
all the heartache and all the joy amount to the wonder of life i knew as a boy
_))))))___
always again myself that i find
are all our reflections mine?
not our bodies nor our faces
that look in the pupils of far off other places
that mystic shadow on which light just sheens
pools of blackness where all our sights gleamed
radiant jewels adorn our pupils, worn like open portals in our eyes
showing so plainly what they do hide
deep in that mystery our true self yet to find
__
12/04/11
Tell me where you want to go and ill tell you where iv been
how many things can be seen by seeing from within
to other lands I couldn’t touch with my own hands
astral dreaming , wandering in that mystic feeling
flying through the bright midnight
to far off stars by dragon flight
their rainbow scales tell age old tales
of wishing wells and following rainbows
to the end of the tunnel of light
they whisper of these divine sights
showing colours so warm and bright , hues beyond those ever shown
in our reality that delusion has grown
we are limited by our seeing
all the while we are supreme beings
curiously dreaming as the lessons pass by
quietly wondering the reason why
each flower grows to die
without the death of others feeding the earth
there would be no more new birth
each lost has worth
each to come has meaning
through the endless infinity loop
our souls constantly reeling
_______
golden stairway
a steep incline
humbled and open
we dutifully climb
while the ivy grows fast to block our path
and falsehoods infect our most precious facts
remember that nothing is promised
nothing is missing
everything here, is here for a reason
all that your seeing think it over in time
think for yourself
so your self you will remind
___
____
11/26/11
three rows
three lines
jumbled keys
tumbled rhymes
no more time
the constant now
no more ways
to show how
now is the time of believing
without doubts of yesterdays dreaming
tomorrow seeming never to come
day last forever until it is done
like every other one
yet like sustain
things dont stay quite the same
everything does change
as all cycles will pass
if you think its too slow
its probably too fast
though everything truly is right on track
____________
follow the rainbow unending
the constant spiral , rising higher
furthur from earth wind an fire
yet ever closer still
always will be moving away
always will be here to stay
better this way
slowly becoming
something from nothing
___
theres things i wish to say
i dont know where the words go
the rhymes i used to know
the times i used to glow
the embers of becoming
something from nothing
the fires still burn
the phoenix still yearns
to rise ever higher
to be consumed by the very flame
to turn to dust and rise again
the fractal as infinite as the atoms dance
the duality as meaningful as the cosmos romance
father sky an mother earth
each turn of the spiral
the reason for our birth
0 1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21 34 55 89 144 233
yes sometimes
sometimes the numbers remind of a truth so distant
yet never far away
a truth we see each and every day
though we are blind
we see the signs we need to be reminded
the hidden code
in all that shows
secrect symbols left to find
a deeper meaning i cant describe
___
11/28/11
..........................................................
at a loss for words
at times its so absurd what i seem to think
but its as though im always on the brink
ever becoming
the something from nothing
what is the price
the cost of what we sacrifice
faith in a unknown plan
feeling the touch of unseen hands
caring deeply for every man
and every woman
as if their eyes speak the omen
of what we are to become
and what we are running from
back to all one
for good and through ill
our way our will
_____
11/24/11
dont doubt it
let it try
answers a-plenty in the by an by
take some time an let it grow
takes some time to let it show
letting go
lets it flow
an feelin as if its already there
hold the dream to stay aware
thoughts we need
like air we breath in light
we let go of dark
untangle the web
that left us torn apart
broke an stuck
by our own hands
no more cause to pretend
no more denial to defend
all the wounds time will mend
and all the youth years will steal
still as always the love is real
never fade away
somethings beyond us always will stay
to that we must pray
that infinite sway of which the cosmos were birthed
that same force that turns our storms
the spark an fuel that feeds the fires
the humble few
the lessons reviewed
it all makes sense
yet nothing does
somethings gotta move
push has come to shove
like so many times before
how many dove messengers do we need to tell of the light beyond the door
hope reminds so many more are finding the key to the gateway
inside them the safety of which so many have dreamed
though its always seemed out of reach.....
_________
11/22/11
when will time come
i feel the hours getting late
never waiting
always yearning
pushing learning
till i feel its time to run
never knowing whats become
no way of going back to one
but all is showing its whats to come
all the signs an all the symbols
staying home to watch the rain
i am young an life is long
time is on my side today
an then one day i find
the whole years passed behind me
feels like a days passed
an my mind is filled with tumbled rhymes
home
welcome home again
i love being here when i am
feeling light i build a fire
let its embers warm me brighter
far away
across the years
calling from a distant time
draws me closer to the truth of all my years
the past the future
all the same in tumbled rhyme
____________________
how many times has the rain fell this way
how many times has the night took the day
waking to find nothing is lost nor saved
all things eventually must pass by this way
lingering memories, meaning so hard to find
everything seeming connected somehow at all times
the riddled rhymes
the fleeting youth
all of the pathways, never leading to truth
our footprints in the sand are no sign of proof
the tides turning them gently away
seemingly always has been this way
remembering partly, iv been here before
then soon forgetting, as i pass through the door
always becoming, lending myself
something from nothing
the cost of our wealth
_____________
11/20/11
laughing at the devil in all our sin
i know the truth from where iv been
its all within , how many other ways to say
how many stars are outshone by the light of day
so turn on the night , yes
let it shine bright
you are the flame throughout all your change
an you are the waters nourishing growth
this remains my mortal toast to my infinite life
i paid my dues in babylons of ill refute
iv felt as though my life were through
till again i found you
my cosmic twin my divine feminine
i embrace thee my sweet goddess
i anoint thee with the essence of my becoming
we the soul that started from nothing
the void of whats been shows us from how far we have come
so far from undone but spiraling lovingly closer to all one
___
My Starrlight by Derek PsyTalez
my night is cool
my sun is warm
my stars are bright
my love runs deep
through all the waters and ground beneathe our feet
the troubles we keep until they shiver in abandon
as we all are cast away
the timeless battle , ever wanting of more
but never walking through the open door
a love thought too forbidden
the original sins have all been forgiven
all our dark is only what we have been in
and now our lovelight burns strong
loving mother tend me in your arms
only lover grace me with the pleasure of feeling one
inside you i have become my own cherished son
as great as the one in the sky
when i look deep into those beautiful blue eyes
i see the future of our lovings psy
_____
all the hopes gleamed
from all of yesterdays dreams
nothing as it seems
or something as it was
only for a moment
atrophy never was
until it wasnt
then it should be
no one was if no one could be
_____________
11/19/11
[1:11:11 PM]Psy: crossroads... will you ever let him go
i went down to the crossroads an unable to decide
i went down the middle splitting apart my two sides
nothing found nothing lost
left turned on the dark
right turned on the light
now the path escapes my sight
vision blurred from tears of fright
i find myself again
the divine male and feminine
fractured i suture my two sides
asleep and alive
i nuture my awarness
love is the nectar of which there is no bareness
though the world seems so harsh an cold
an somethings really are beyond our control
we neednt fit the forms of our mold
must play our hands before we fold
the memories of old
lessons for the now
it will get better
someway somehow
____________
11/18/11
the reason why never ending
always becoming , something from nothing
goes to show what we figure
knot alot
of scripture of all the words we wrote
who took note
but now the time has come again
my friend till the end
within every hopeless victim
a timeless soul of divine wisdom
wiueeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
___________
11/18.11
we are in the end, what we decide
we our friends or foes
we the wrong or the right
cut down the middle , choosing each side
saying our prayers, cutting our ties
..nowhere to hide..
when its all just one
what is ending
what has begun
cylcing on... an unending spiral
fractaling like never before
though its been higher
so burns the fire
entropy of the energy
with greatest of zeal
sometimes i feel this is all too surreal
each moment that passes
the awe still lasts , this constant obsession
my willing progression
yearning for the truth of all lies
the way to mend the two sides
awake apart , asleep in dark
these pained hearts need reminder of being
our dulled awareness left us blind though still seeing
awake though still dreaming
and i swear these dreams iv dreamed them before
i feel like i came in the out door
looking for that reason why
looking up at the sky i pause and wonder
what lays under, the same as above
the earth our mother, the stars our love
_)))))))((((((((((((((((((
all of the moments , leading to when
all of the omens , signals of them?
those the unknown
the mystery grows
as truth is shown
no sense nonsense
mystical presence
ever becoming
my mind keeps me from running
but noway to run
no where to go
some things you can not un-know
learning slow as time goes
i suppose its the natural cycle
spiraling faster, the faithful disciple ____________
____________________
______________
_____________
____________
__________
________
______
all of the reasons i am led to believe
all of the times i am deceived , the realizations that are let be
what a gift it is just to fight to breathe
nothing needs to be but it all is anyway
everything on the mind but nothing much to say
no words to express
"ineffable" at best
yet someone speaks
and someone tries
the words that fall from the skies
an no one tells me to move on
an no one darkens out my light
so i speak an so i try
to light the fire down inside
calling from a distant time
the echoes of a sunlit hill
where were going
where were from
whats becoming
whats begun
the all one
the seed the tree
becoming to be
from the limbs branching out
realizing connection runs throughout
yet we push further fractaling away
from our one source everyday
moving inevitably towards convergence at last
golden era of peace like those that passed
_________________
11/14/11
walkin down by the river side
its a dusty road, an im rollin light
the rivers long an the rivers wide
it speaks to me as it ripples by
there was a place i used to know
there was too much pain an nothing changed, i had to go
i had to go i had to go it was too much pain thats all i know
my time was through an im moving on
left my home an im holding strong
walk all day an i walk all night
sun gone now, an theres no town in sight, nowhere to sleep nowhere tonight
the stars are out, the night takes the heat
i keep my step to the crickets beat
just a worn coat stretched on my back, and battered boots tied onto my feet
the night is cool , now the winters here
the fires warm , an my thoughts are clear
_____
11/13/11
an if it wasnt, then it wouldnt be
but as it is , its just what we see
or more.. maybe
always the wonder
often the reason
blank slates to find
the cause for our being
ourselves the question
our riddles the seasons
encoded knowledge , placed by divine or hidden to find
or just more patterns , to teach or remind
nothings found nothings lost
each life we live , its own cost
an endless cycle?
like the waves rhyme
back and forth
living and dying
the sun rise
the sun set
may each day be another reset
because tomorrow never is
till its today , just as all the others
here for now , gone again
like another spore tossed in the wind
another seed to flourish again
another self born winter son in spring
all the nature speaking
all the words without a tune
still the glimmer of the moon looms and i know a knowing that cant be known
a knowing that through no words could be shown
and what is the reason
a high grade fax machine used for dry cleaning
a tetrahedron peg forced in round hole
as if seeming beyond my control
at times it gets a lil old , but not as old as time itself
thinking in spirals again i wonder the wealth
from outside looking in to inside looking out
it takes time to know time
an time wounds all heals
just as we are just as we feel
theres always choice, though chaos ensues
another roll of the dice, chose now ... red or blue?
___________
11/13/11
how many open door ways to the mind, i wonder
how many windows are there to find hidden under
always gazing at the works of divine
some higher mind must of designed such utter perfection
each piece of the fractal the same as the whole projection
thoughts keep us guessing
always reflecting
looking deeper out inside
unfolding the layers
reaching furthur for the light
i pause my wonder to take in the sights
and my minds eye gapes
seeing the spiral i await the coming trials
an reflect on those that passed
no pain lasts only love
with its wings i soar above misery and dismay
despair can not reach me no more today
i choose which thoughts win or lose the fight for my mind
though all of my searching, its still myself that i find
my choice to run or hide
my reason to stand still
my thoughts think for something
my faith withholds my will
____________
11/12/11
living the moment
the now is the when
all of the omens
projections of then
the time of believing
the cycles that pass
the days, nights and seasons
its only what were seeing
notice the time is always running behind
natural true rhythm to find
spherical spiral , in and out vibrating higher
like the flame of the minds eye's fire when at one
nestled safely in the lotus of becoming
something started from nothing
soon in 'time' we will see
life is all about 1 2 3
))_____________
11/12/11
when all the sorrows of blighted pain.. creep in your mind
and all of your time seems the endless struggle
the slow sustain, never move forward never look behind
searching for answers so hard to find
turtles all the way down , so they say
hard to explain another way.. a box in a box in a box in a box
or something like a maze or a hall of mirrors where reflection never stops
an illusion of sorts.. created by some unknown or perhaps known force
maybe its usweyoume and separation is a delusion thats grown
pain and misery brings clearity to reality though its hard to define
going through hardships does well to remind , what its like to be treated in kind
your love is mine, we are the same
we are the change , we will remain
the light shines the same in each and every of myself
through our cracks the brightest , the key to our wealth
slumbering wisdom received from divine
awakened feeling more then alive
how many lives have we died
how many seas and how many skies
like all the stars that shine in the night
the endlessness endless as is the light
the light the love inherent since birth
this is the reason we all have self worth
a spark of love from above and evolution cycled on
now its our turn to return to the one
from the spawn we branched apart
learned to conquer and light the dark
all along thriving strong
now the time has come again
to tear apart the walls we built within
stop our sin
the horrid struggle against our brothers
when we are all from the same mother
only one , no other
____________________
11/10/11
tell it to me...
oh the whiskey dont work, please no more for me
id rather take a bit of lsd
ole whiskey gonna make my body dead
oh i drank some good beers , iv tried some rum
but whiskeys the best drink iv ever done
ole whiskey gonna make my body dead
well i drink my whiskey better then any man
a half a fifth a gallon an i still can stand
ole whiskey gonna make my body dead
its burnin holes in every where
now when i swallow pains always there
ole whiskey gonna make my body dead
aint drank in bout a week, lets have a lil fun
had half a pint an im barely numb
the ole whiskey done made my body dead
_)__)_)_)_)_)_)_)_)_)_)_)_
11/05.11
i dont know
i dont want to let it show
it hurts my soul
everyday letting go
i want to know
but everyday it hurts me so
all the things were going through
its time to do what we can do
but i dont know now what to do
i feel my time is really through
i dont know what i can do
and lessons for me
reason to be
all the beauty i still see
though my vision may get blurry
i try my best not to worry
tell myself its just a test
i flood my heart with love leaving no room for regrets
i love her more then can ever be said
love remains even when im dead
even if this is all in my head
i know what i want , not to follow or be led
i think for myself , sometimes too much
but i love my life even though it can be such
a tangled mess , knots i untie without rest
every reason why i just guess
and even if i die now i tried my best
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
that agonizing feeling
cast out alone
isnt that always when our true self is shown
the light of none other shines down our path
should we question of which way we grasp
as if falling in abyss
i find my self calling 'can we stop this'
but it all starts to run
as my mind comes undone
again the pieces falling are saying its one
spiraling out from the all that iv done
an all thats been done to me
just as everything else ... passing by gracefully
____________
11/08/11
all the times lost prophets
what have they found?
grave dust an a eulogy.. where their hope may resound.
a dream of a dream of remembering what it was
that started us , that parted us..
as if appearing from above.
forces shove to control each side
though each man hide
behind the cover of another
while ones still the other
no ones left to part
this disturbed him greatly
from the light he stole the dark
__
11/7/11
so often we talk our selves into knots
as if perspective hasnt gleamed enough
thoughts criss crossing
meaning lost in something undefined
turning a beautiful melody
such as life
into a riddled rhyme
lessons to find in everyday
everyway the light meets my eyes
the cause up to me to define
through the cracks the light shines more
anticipating as i peer through the door
whats the future for?
our decision
what is life for?
its our mission
whatever we decide
the right and wrong
the peace we fight
Jesus Christ
Mother Mary
all that's to love
or to be found scary
all that's unknown
all that's shown
all with reason
every season
every leaf
just as every grain of sand on every beach
in all things, much to teach
listen well
soundless voices cause the spell
that mystic nostalgia we know so well
heaven or hell metaphors for earth
likewise our inner self worth
the inherent karma of our births
nothing comes for free
just as we come with all we need
the love is real will not fade away
just as the dark replaces day
the words the voices say
the meaning hidden in the rivers rhyme
the light will return
all good things in all good time
))))))))))))))))))))))
no say no nothing
everytime i see something i must bite my tongue
feeling numb from all iv done
an all thats one
its too much to bare
how much i care and can not correct whats wrong
not to say i am not strong
i endure what my life is for
the tests and trials theres no denial
i want to rise higher
my minds eye burning the fire of my hearts desire
for now i wait to pass the lessons i now take
_)______
11/05/11
wont something pacify my soul
this need to have control
it gets a little old , watching on helpless as can be
watching destruction waving towards me
back and forth the chaos ensues
takes what it wants to take, whatever good fortune has gifted unto you
my vision quakes , my heart breaks
chance waits for my weakest moment to be saved
faith evaporates as my soul is chilled by the sun
one way or the other its the same for everyone
but we never walk alone , even when only our footsteps are shown
just a test , a path of trial
our choice, acceptance or denial
me a man among men
such a task just to befriend another soul
another reflection of letting go
all the times i used to wish to know the reasons
now i just want comfort through this season
like the change the autumn brings
once green leaves clinging to their trees
turn their colours , fly and spin
going places theyve never been
only to die and rot , food for the next , why?
a marvelous cycle as the winter closes the sky
cold snow an rain blot out the sun
heavy clouds with cool winds now come
hibernation, wondering asleep..
will another spring come to be?
_________________
11/04/11
more words someone some wheres has already heard
maybe written a new way
unique just for the day
everything to say has already been said
everyone alive has already been dead
just like all who sleep must someday wake
its now up to us , our own illusion to break
tear off the veil so many still wear
the need to feel separate
when we are all parts of perfection
and our mere lives are what we must sacrifice
realize life is projection
shed our ego's reflection
let the inner divine shine bright
fill your minds eye with sacred sights
the voices will come when feeling all one
together were strong and shall not depart
spiraling over our one ancient heart
__________
11/04/11
all the doubts that fade you out
truth forced from here from all your fears
when in light there is no fright
the fear unknown the dark now shown
and if you want to see
dont close your eyes..
if you want to stay
dont run to hide..
the evening late the sun go down
soon the dark will all surround.
you hear the voices call again
you know they call out from within ...
if you want to hear
dont block out your mind..
and if you want to know
dont fear what you may find..
no tme to wait the time is now
forced to break this wall somehow .
when i get there then ill know
all will someday soon be shown ...
____
lash your thoughts down
dont make yourself frown
all around at all times
beauty or dismay as far as the eyes can see
and our thoughts even furthur if we dont let our minds be
its all apart of we
every feeling is with reason
years will pass through the seasons
call on the stars light , ask to know why
search for answers dont let the truth hide
and we may never know
seeking without expecting
holding what we are letting go
this life but a gift, every day or nothing is
if nothing is , nothing was
then nothing will be
not this maybe
maybe not
these thoughts dont stop
this and that , distract distract
its got the feeling but not exact
more or less , "enough" always a guess
but it never is
hopes are found let down to find surprise gifts
lifes twists
no stopping this the ebb and flow
cant take hold while letting go
all the truth you seek to know
but what ever is
all of it a guess , just like this
and we may wonder all we like
at the end of the day its still just life
_____________________
10/31/11
how far can i turn a blind eye today
are there any answers if we leave the questions lay at rest
oh i wonder are there answers if we leave the questions at rest
is our faith only a guess
never knowing yet believing life is love
as we are feeling must not be dreaming
it feels so real though it seems so surreal
far from these countries and worry
a new day will rise from the old
and though this visions still blurry
i know it will come true just as sure as its been told
say i know it will come true just as sure as its been told
never to wonder the hurry
the madness i have to let it be
oh if not ill be thrown into sadness
and that way just is not for me
said that way just is not for me
_______________
the meek shall inherit the earth
when only the strong survive
The weak will go on living, when all the others die
trying to fight to survive, taking each others lives over a patch of land
to make one rich man millions must suffer for him
all the while that mans no different from the others
the weak shall discover that they are the many
all together their power is plenty
___________
we give all power , in every way
on every day, its all in our heads
or out of our minds, transmitted from divine
all around at all times... a floating web of grand design
connecting all , the energy flow
as all is one there is no where for it to go
but back and forth endlessly
reflected progressively
spiraling brighter all of the time
as the moon changes in rise and decline
the wax and wane like the waves and leaves that lap and change
natures rhythm the same as the end is the beginning
once more the door is a window
the window a mirror
only to see clearer , the hall of reflections
cosmic self, endless projection
_________
no one seems to know
an no one seems to care
it doesnt seem to matter if no one is aware
if there is no truth there aint nothing to lose
i guess its just our faith to choose
whats the use of denying or relaying
on faiths that may never resound the truth were hoping to find in
an endless maze the calling destine to craze our illusion of reality
tearing apart all around me all the things i do and dont see
all the layers with no room for nay-sayers
faith is true but with it i know not what to do
i give my love i fill my heart with the light from above
i do my part the best i can
even if i am only a man
_______________
10/29/11
from the only... time that matters
holding you my only... the one that matters
remembering me lonely... lost and scattered
now that i have you, i cant go back there
i dont want whats out there
i cherish what we have here
my desire has never been ever more clear
my content has never been so so complete
you are the all that i ever do need
i need your love for a reason to breathe
alone im just another soul lost in lifes sea
____________
what have say ye
of all the balance of inequality
is it ever so perfect
is it really truly worth it
may we wait?
where is our break?
its time to change?!
can we stay the same?!
oh no, cant wait
its time, no time..
no time to change!
why is life like this
why is god above this
why... i dont know i sigh
no more reasons
accept what your seeing
its just another day
made to pass another way
___________
life is hard, yea life is tough
i try my best while its getting rough
every day in every way
theres still some things ... i just cant say
i try so hard , so hard to bare
this isnt fun , this isnt fair
time is short, it never waits
till its gone, an your at the gates
so say your piece
your time is through
what have you done
what did you do
now answer me , how does it matter
life is through , what have you gathered?
iv paid my dues, iv tried my best
time is gone, where is the rest?!
ohhh i cant complain..
iv had some fun, i am not the same
now im done
ohhh i cant complain..
iv found divine, i found the beauty
by losing my mind
_______________
id have to say i wish there were another way
but its so far off, could it happen here today?
only if we did it together but people i know better
all the while bad apples in the bunch
all along the reason was us
freewill led to deceit and mistrust
separating us, when we are all from one tree
now theres so much entropy to see
we could stop it maybe , but is it too late
the new earth wont wait.. time gone for idle wonder
door keeps opening wider for all to discover
there will soon be no turning away
the light will shine through those that keep it at bay
there is no darkness that can hide you from yourself
inevitably the divine truth will burn through
the one cosmic self
+__
cant just smile a the spirals of untimely wealth
the militant rivals of sickness in health
the cosmic self
a planet a star a moon
there you are
mass leads to gravity
thoughts breed reality
projected duality
imaginations of time
was i ever here before?
no answers, more rhymes
spilling light of divine races through my mind
just like every other time here i am
back within where iv been
the cosmic self
the cosmic twin
all is reflection
i know it within
infinite projection
from a rain drop to the cosmos at spin
______________________________________
so as not to wonder
i will wait awhile
thoughts cause minds to plunder hopes and faith
lost replaced with doubts that waste, that spoil
like gears that toil , any fear a wrench in the works
from our minds we may not divorce
must control the force
with great power much responsibility indeed
our thoughts may flow
our thoughts may ebb
fill the dark of inner dread with light of love that never ends
you are your friend the best friend indeed
you are everything you need
you are the one , you are the other
love each other, theres no starting over
in this time of 3 6 9
we will remind, the power of 12
the perfection , ourselves
heaven or hell in the 7's endless spells
fractaling away all the 2's 4's and 6's of the day
into the one the 12 of the sun
from these pyramids so mysterious
a soundless voice is calling to us
our thoughts do become us
but how much is mine
and how much divine
wondering at times if theres separation at all
realizations that fall,
one to the next theres always more yet
no solid truth , evasive reasons
feelings of eternal youth through all ill age
thoughts hazed by understanding
not withstanding tests of time
for now im fine
have i ever been before?
somethings trying to pull me
to the other side through the door
________________
somedays i just dont understand
whats the big idea the grand master plan
i see the signs , i weaken and climb
up and down like stairs that wind into one another
always more to discover.. i start to wonder
is there any escape to this endless maze
my logic crazes out of reason
feeling the spiral , my body seizing to be
not just me
but the many
The one
The plenty
falling into the one
i start to notice what iv done
clearly.. i, the maker , the made
it is always up to me to change
so whats with reflection
is this a hall of mirrors or some divine projection
seeming perfection seeing the chaos as it is
the end of bliss
entropy at long last
just as the now shall be the past
_______________________
10-25-11
i want to modulate my receptors
i want to dominate my projector
strip away ego's residues
cleanse the mirror of inner truth
observing reflection i open wide
behind the veil that logic hides
no more time left to remind
all is one the spiral is nearing done
into infinity, all our lifetimes amounting to continuity
--------------------------------------
laying on the flame heated rock
gazing in the fire at impossible square knots
gently unfolding, visions of knowing
concepts so vast words may not even grasp
the balanced weight of the ideals, flashing in familiar symbols surreal
no contact , out of touch.. with the body robotic gazing backwards at the view
feeling the me in myself looking at my body as another you
as we are each other, myself is no other
feeling the all one permeate my being
i trust the faith knowing from seeing
returning again the cosmos at spin
body regained though something has changed..
_______________________________________
i want to light the fire
i want to burn it again
I want the fire brighter
i light the flame from within
gentle i spark the tinder
wading in at long last
better not to dive under, swift undertow moving past
quiet now i wonder
whats to gain from all thats changed
the pieces found in the puzzle ever spot a piece the same
now everything is clear to see but not to look ahead but just around me
the light has found me
i have found it
i am unity itself
half and half no longer split
___________________
from the outside
looking in
find myself in all the eyes i have ever seen
why the wonder of this life
i pay the price of strife and sacrifice
for all the vastness that iv glimpsed
like the wind at night is brisk
and the moon that glows with it
a gentle rolling wave
cools and calms my soul to save
the dark in day has come to pass
an will see light again at last
like the new born rising sun
shining down for all one
outside is inside when we remember where we have been
outside is inside when we remember where we have been
always ending in the beginning again
reborn new life now learn the price so grow like new gears in the device
keep the wheels turning keep the soul yearning
our minds designed for learning
our bodies burning the energy as the worlds turning
the mind cycles on
growing more strong
the way of becoming
thought controls numbing our possibility
they may control only if we let their will be
my thoughts become me
i am myself
we are each other and need work together
for humanities health
__________
yea i like to believe it
at times my thoughts let me see it
no words to describe you just gotta feel it
that inner touch that grace of love
that kind that surrounds from the stars above
as well as within
the timelessness youve always been
the inner triangle of primal power
the lines of divinity the pyramids that tower
housing truth in symbolic form
many the sides as lessons we learned
as our thoughts burn our bodies grow lax
forgetting the present the future the past
feeling the now the endless moment
divining truth through hidden omens
iv been this before over and over
the same month of october yet moving closer
the spiral of life i swing with delight as well as in pain
i am myself through all that iv changed
______________
running through the running through the
night
running through the running through the
night
forever forever chasing light
forever forever chasing light
when will we get there
life can only be fair
wonder when we'll get there
life can only be fair
all the time i know the truth is there
all the signs force to take care
never knowing
thoughts growing
the end beginning again
cyclic nature becoming greater
changes waver thoughts of the savior
so due in time
the waves that hush the wind in rhyme
why the visitor has never questioned
for each mistake an equal lesson
thoughts consume the mind in rough hewn lines
fuzzing logic causing the body to become robotic
then you wonder from where you came
the all one source within the brain a cosmic receiver
downloading knowledge into the believer
transcendent waves of unnamed blazes of colours
crazing vision of the truth
the endless fountain of endless youth
our thoughts reborn in other forms
_____________________
10/21/11
run to the river, let it call us to the sea
where we may find some comfort, possibly
under the rainbow where my love lay
all of tomorrow mixed with today
gentle the rhythm calls out to me
graces my fingers with long lost memory
now is the time that always has been
release hold and let your love pour in
its only a dream if nothings as it seems
how are we here and where have we been
where are we going, will we be let in
all this time spent wondering
many the way of becoming
many the parts, many the cycles
all with reason, all that we fight through
the striving to be
the yearning to see
life a chance we behold
as each of our stories unfold
each setting sun rising as one
through the doubts, loss an pain
brings light to wonder, the unbroken chain
everything just as should be
including you inside of we
_____________________
TERRAPIN
of all these words our sorrows plight
the dark begins to fade the light
when our madness reigns supreme
and our life it seems a dream
trust in faith inside we dwell
a light no shadows dark shall dispel
the fires glow grows faint again
an empty feeling spilling in
only love can fill that hole
its up to us to keep control
why we wonder of this light
why the darkness tries to fight
all the answers are within
of the truth we've always been
its all with reason and something looms
it is our glory not our doom
_____________________________
10/19/11
i am different because i am the same
i am myself through all that iv changed
growth an learning remains the constant goal
still at times i lose the will to self control
letting go taking hold
hiding the pain so nobody knows
caring for others beyond my self
healing within for greater self wealth
seeing the light in darkness of night, the moon a dry mirror in the sky
reflecting the light from the divine
knowing myself as you and i , i bless our hearts
together we are better and shall not depart
we mustnt fracture without each other our lives scatter
into a fractal of suffering pain
only together can we change
must refrain from letting go
always trusting though we never know
time is slow as its fast
nows today till its passed
like the cycle of a tree
our souls the roots our lives the leaves
to spring to life, buds that burst to bloom
always knowing, to die and fall is our doom
our thoughts looming, we cherish our seed
knowing that someday they will be more trees
just like these only better
with our blessings i know they will get there
____________________
i want to write but cant force the flow
letting go i wonder why
till my minds silence i break with a sigh
what do i even want to rhyme
another waste of time? written another way..
sometimes in silence i miss what the voices say |
mind blank thoughts sank down beneathe the realm of reason
learning the cause of every feeling
cosmos reeling ... no it can never stop awhile
may not pause an lay idle
life just tends to be always slipping away from me
or i to it?
if i were to step would i get stuck or would i slip
never mind the bullshit let us get this show on the road
my thoughts have grown far out of control
but i guess thats the reason for my mold
same old rhymes that never get old
so many ways to fashion a rhyme
so many ways to dispel your time
ooooohh all the wonder
what is the point
for now i wait
whos got a joint?
_______________
theres just no way it always fades
whats come to pass it never lasts
and never could, at least thats how it seems
as if life were but a fleeting dream
i say what i mean but does it come through
all the meaning i want to express to you
running through my mind like the sands of time
always more to find then whats been left behind
the journey towards more
exploring the open door
i feel my soul break the constraints of my mold
awareness of body slowly letting go
drifting to know
i see the rainbow flowers the golden hallways of timeless valor
i hear the distant call the angels singing for one in all
playing sweetly a mandolin comes to soothe my soul again
cascading sound coats and surrounds
the time is now
and always has been
even a saint knee deep in sin
every cause has a reason alike
every shadow is partly of light
wrong is right in this old routine
clearly life is more then what it seems
now i dont say there is only one way
or only one path
it may all lead to the same place at long last
or perhaps we fractal away
what is the truth? i never can say
each wonder only a guess
despite what surrounds i wonder the rest
seeing that triforce design in my mind
another reflection of inner divine
what does it mean to glimpse those pearl stairs
the halos of angels circling the air
the winged ones gaze down with care
flashing fractured light signals im there
but where is there?
tho the questions never answered
im just reminded in time ill get there
but where is there?
or while im at it where is here?
too much to know the cause of fear
wondering the unknown that may never be shown
my wonder has grown i can hardly contain
wanting the truth i can barely refrain
i have to ask why i want to know now
slipping away i forgot to ask how
________
on the way, its hard to say where
most the time i try not to care
for if we wonder do we wander blind
what may we lose what may we find
eleven thousand rainbows dancing colours in the sky
all this timeless beauty with all the reason to ask why
so all the time i cant decide
the rhymes the reason
nothing seeming out of place
all the words i cant replace
slipping by so fast theres no time to waste when wondering why
so many times the wonder turns runs and hides
but truth never lies even when it does
if im not the one then nobody ever was
by that i mean this isnt some kind of dream
were all the one its so complete
the way is there its our job to reach
_________________________________________________
10/16/11
im fucked, i should of thought about it enough or took the time to listen
now somethings missing, time passes day to day pain attacks in every way
never may go away but i still have hope for today
why the pain without end why the trials to have a friend
knowing love can mend we try our best still enslaved to daily tests
hope remains the daily faith which no doubt can replace but its all around
in a seamless ocean of light we are the sound
manifestations of divine being
there is a cause for all we are feeling
living dreaming its all in our heads
all in our minds awake asleep or dead
the cosmic knowledge on which i fed
i let it into my head from the light of our sun
shines the light of the one
eyes closed looking towards the middle forehead
to the center triforce , let the visions flash but do not let them dazzle you to a lull
appreciate their beauty and give thanks then let your intentions be known ,
feel your body let go feel your soul rise
breathe in light let it permeate
immerse your soul in love
___________
10/16/11 (Channeled eyes closed meditive typin)
we all just want a change but what remains if nothing stays the same who will be saved? not the maker nor the made, the inevitable fade... but does it have to be that way? no one knew cause no one thought but are there answers? not alot... dont go nor stop? then no wonder theres more then less to discover no answers but riddles a chiropractor on a fiddle, a baker made to riddle... the mechanic mellow dramatic, another one of the same old stories that never was so no reason to worry as it never will be again, the beginning is the end.. cut roll the credits, show the previews now dont forget it the time will come again.. new loss new friend. were all each other behind dark eyes mesmerized by the unknowing, thoughts of self growing into becoming, the other sides numbing has now come to pass the numb didnt last.. life stinging through every me is every you. lessons all through every ones day to day, we are made this way.. its all for our learning as the cosmic wheels continue turning we must make the best of the time we have here.. do our part to help the others and make our faith clear. the truth is near an the future is now, there is no more time left to question how we simply must do.. only together can we make it through as now is the time like never before... soon all will witness the meaning of christ shown through the door
10/16/1
soul ascension, body of light activation
thats the goal of all of creation?
or perhaps we are just as the ants
or they are just as we are
rearranged particles of some exploded star...
lessons for knowing in everything showing
so perhaps we are here to learn through our fear
love of light keeps me here despite all the trails there may be no denials
life is a gift and my riddle to solve
never again will i build up the walls
my love is worth growing
my cups overflowing
i spill my sweet waters on all open shores
i know my loving is what im here for
i nurture the weary, those that cant walk i carry
for those that cant talk i speak
for those that cant ask i reach
as if i were every man i smile calmly an shake their hand
the way to be shines within
transmute to light all of your sin
______________
to love another we must love the self
to realize reflection is to see inner wealth
no longer comparing this one to that, realizing instead theres no separation in fact
all things keep coming back to we are all one
we need to come together rather then undone
lifes not always having fun but learning right from wrong
who we are is what we've been through not from where we've come
looking through a mirror we are meant to see clearer
all we are is all we let us be
and all we want is all we let us see
_______________________
as if a mirror on the wall
there you are
the life you knew the words you wrote
your battered shoes and worn-in coat
you say you have the way in scripture
to paint a picture so divine
we draw with interlocking circles and connecting lines
that curve behind the hidden seams
so nothing seems out of place
no mistakes
life just is a lil over dramatic
at least its not lost in the attic
on the wall of every home
in every mind creative thoughts grown
the constant wondering, thinking outside the lines
the cookie cutter designed lives we live, cultivate to give
waste all that which we can replace
just for another taste
its a common theme, a timeless daydream
yet so obscene, the mindless self indulgence routine
nothing seems to be the way it oughta be
not that i know what that would be
seems at times the whole universe might close ontop of me
or at least i feel the weight.. much too great for my mind
as i approach the soul divine, it sends me reeling
cursing and feeling the limits of my mold, which i control
though i tumble down the hill i return to climb and always will
the energy moves through we and i must guide it
while i see others battle to control or hide it
i shall not cower i know our power
from no lesson will my soul break
there is no test that is too great
everything to say has been said
everything to write has been read
the all one source within our head
unlimited knowledge on which we fed
the forbidden fruit that stems so sweetly from the root
on earth our tree provides all we need
the fruit shows all but helps man build walls
the knowing made us have to keep from showing the isness the suchness of life
we have become so distant while still so near to our plight
let in the light let your love grow
there is no danger to the darkness that the light does now show
all with reason all things balance
the mind a kingdom
the earth a palace
_____
10/15/11
so we dont wonder
now let us wait
for the time of becoming
to be made first we must break
but to every moment we do relate
all things with reason
like the variance of the seasons
all things seeming to be right on track
long forgotten knowledge keeps flooding back
many times before i have walked through the door
total reflection on both sides
yet all things different as the truth does like to hide
but only to remind the truth is worth seeing
wondering always the cause of our being
_)))))))
creative thought, the kingdom within every mind
in every one of us, untold wonder there to find.
no words nor rhymes can even approach...
the divine wisdom no words have yet wrote,
but only caught a glimmer of the shine
hidden within every one of us in time
the answer will show
slowly becoming, what we still dont know
_____________
one day i realized its up to me
and i was so thankful to be allowed to see
the perfection around me as unbalanced as it may seem
often takes on the wonder like the beauty of a dream
like every fading scene, change will pass away each theme
the endless spiral which we ride
a body to serve a soul
the self denies control
choose ascension beyond our molds
break restraints of thought controls
you are divine
its up to you
your thoughts or mine
_______________
10/12/11
the empty space, far left behind
leaving letters of words, old broken rhymes
the silence pervaded, my thoughts have been taken..
down through the earth, i let my soul flow
to the roots of life i used to know..
such is the hill i tumble up slow, slipping still
maybe i always will, as i reach that top silvery peak
i fall back away from the freedom i seek.
not to be discouraged, i still see the sight
the glory to be, is still worth the fight
_____________
10/12/11
life a beach the far side so many try to reach
but never do question the sand on which they stand
just like the sand here i am, stretched before me an behind
a billion particles of stardust to find.. to mesmerize
as they slip across my feet, i realize each parts unique
though equal to the whole.. like myself who i teach
the very many me's in all of you i try to reach
my voice speaks in many ways
in all the things that all of us say
and even words unsaid, sometimes read in numbers or signs
always does show the hidden divine left here to find
life is a riddle an after all the answers all mine
so i do wonder with lifetimes of time
__________
the clocks tick
the gears click
the keys unlock
the shows stop
the body rocks
the stomach knots
the mind unwinds
across reels of time
spirals unfolding
releasing the knowing
showing the open
the whole of the picture
the meaning of scripture
the cost that will be
the future we will see
all to our choosing
all for our using
and losing
for what is lost
was only found
everyday the earth turns round
nothing lost and nothing remains
day by day we are the change
4/17/12
far past the oldest cities rusty soiled gates
beyond the farmers fields farrowed by countless days running in place
the forest trees extend their reach, reclaiming what we once took
as we build our shelves an write our books
we use the wood an rot the roots
no one looked so no one found
the answer within
without , around
----------------------
after awhile the mind starts to stop
after a spell the body will slowly rot
time wounds all of faiths heals
bliss in discomfort an all in between we will feel
the obvious reason why we are here
this an so much more
ineffable... the only word
the only word for sure
------------------
we often defend the nay-sayers
an foolishly we encourage the trouble makers
with best intentions we talk ourselves numb
with all the things we have an have not done
our view of the sun fractured by our view through the sky
tidal forces rearranging all the wonderings of why
we drink until the well is dry
no more ways, too wet our lives
too many people too few supplies
-------------------------------
that mystic mountain top
between today an tomorrow
where our dreams may never stop
a separate spot from all the rest
a different place with different tests
what wonder has led us here
what lack of love has caused our fear
we walk a thin line
moving forward while falling behind
hoping to find what we already had
within the mind, the good an the bad
--------------------------------------------------
4/16/12
you cant have all without everythingduality is an illusion all is the whole picturethe creation must be the way it is with great reasonsince thinking this iv tried to figure out what the reasons for things may be. albeit only a hall of mirrors to see clearer.if all is one i am everyone and everyone is mejust as i am every leaf of every treeand every pebble on every beachthese concepts seem a lil out of reachbut my faith i put to testits the only way i know to live with out regretsseeing life as lessons and tests
------------------------------
and its no secrete... what lay before our open eyes.between the obvious lies and less clear illusions despite every bit of faith we are usingultimate confusion- and if our wonder ground to a halt
would we plunder the treasure of the vault?
the keys to the mind we found over time
turning the locks hoping to find
all the while drifting behind
our tongues tied in knots
my thoughts mixed in rhyme
where are we going?
where have i been?
what is the motion?
causing this spin..
-------------------------
may our dreams spirit our souls away not all us derelicts destine to stay in this earthly prison take heed of everything as if its a lessonwithout knowing we are bound to keep guessingour faithful progression forming our minds from what we find
whether mundane or divine
another saint of circumstance
in this great chaotic dance
no false moves, it flows as it should
its hard to fathom
the sound of silence is its anthem
that mystic void not empty at all
more then just empty space
between you and the wall
-------------------------
i said i like your style of knowing that something divine barely showingthe way we know without making it clearwhat more is to find while we are herebiding our time as our thoughts disappear
)_____________)
if my words did glowwould you seek to know their shineif they were a hand me downfrom someone else and not minewould you hear the words between the lineswould you hold it near as if it were divine
all you lose is all you find anyway
listen to the echo of the ripples
hear all the words the river doesnt say
it tickles the mind the answers to find that so often hide away
in plain view it is all you
the ripples distort the surface but the reflections still are true
its a long path without a guide
it can be a strange and wild ride
we have the ticket we did not buy
its our choice to sit or fly
always to drift in wonder?
i dont know dont really care
if i knew the way i would take you there
la da da da la la da da da da
la da da da la da da da
la la de da la la de da da
la la la la
la la la la
---------------------
why does my soul pine? from all the unanswered questions that roam my mindonly time will tell i know an i may only glimpse a part of that as well and i am lucky to view that before it becomes the past which is only relevant in liner form at that
it often feels as though iv been here before
it feels so familiar like theres always something more
something unexplained yet basic and unchanged
i always wonder how chance managed
to land me here with this star and planet
at this time and space
at this stage of the human race
what kind of chance would have such grace?
to land me here of all places
while in all the different faces i still see myself
i always wonder what can i do for the greater health
such a burden all the feelings out there
so many people its easier unaware
but the feelings are there
and i can not shut them off
only with faith can you make the hard soft
--------------------------------
4/11/12
i drove myself mad then found myself glad to be alive i then struggled harder then ever just to survive and was punsished on all sides till i managed to get away day by day and slowly build from what they took away now i stand another man rapt in awe so long stagnation set in... beginning again i slowly restart but still pines the echos the cries of my heart
=----
4/10/12
is the way ever clear?is it my choice to live here?in safety or fear..caught in all the pain i endure its not what i am living for but another mirror to see the perfection that be
all the reflections around me
lord sometimes it feels like im fixin to die
its only then i stop to question and wonder why
forced awareness through pains bareness
a victim of lifes deadly games?
am i at fault? am i to blame?
i know not the answers nor the lies
i have all the patience needed but not enough time
as the days roll by i change myself a bit
as the weeks go by i help where i see fit
days, weeks to months it goes like this
the price we pay for bliss on our way to heaven
the kingdoms luminescent gates of overlaying sevens
my life projecting lessons to learn
by way of accepting our freedom we earn
the trial of thorns paved with sorrows tears
we cross a bridge of awareness above an ocean of fear
the end is not clear but with faith we push ahead
after all a life spent living is better then a life living dead
lost in an endless sea of joy in miserythe tragedy of loving what slowly leavesour lives fragile leaves on the tree of timeare the roots all mine?i wonder what else lay under what we see and what we knowpatiently waiting i watch the seeds of truth grow
what is the meaning of this trial of thorns
what is the reason for the inherent scorn
the devil warns the lights too bright
my inner child's nervous fright
the path unknown not shown not walked its in our heads
we waste our lives by living them dead
following false idols in circles we are led
we must think for ourselves instead
without faith the way will never be found
as we are lost the world still spins round
dont seek to make senseof nonsense and ignorance our tolerance commands we judge only where WE standnot every other manas they judge themselves let go of judgments , for the common wealth
000000000000000000000
a spiral of infinity?no beginning nor an end is clear to seehow can this bethis life seems like a gift to mewhile other times a cursethe harder i try lately it seems to get worse
some unspeakable force plays a part
we make our decisions
while fate breaks our heart
each step in the cycle
faith lights our way through the dark
never give up on the love in your heart
by the mirror on the wallwe always knew we were one we were all but the reflection it never toldthe truth of the story of age oldall is reflection
we fit to our molds
our own to control
a duality reality
we project to unfold
the creative new lessons
the endless ways of infinite projection
all around to see
between the lines.. infinity
all the connections that we see
what is the meaning if its not all me
i see we all are
but why are all we
something strange and unrealsomething different i feelcreeping in the samelike any other regular sensation to my braina vibration, a notion a humbling sustain
hollowed with awareness i raise above the pain
my likeness the same of my maker i am
born again another one i stand
forgotten to remember all iv ever been
a remanent of ancient man
the offspring of never land
forever again found in a second of time
lost in the loops
inside my mind
----------------
--------------------------------------------------
i watch the echos of the silent rainfalling on my window of physical painin this body thats only a part of me, holding mei see what may be becoming to bethe separate reality i always dreamed id seea utopia so hard to reach
a vision of a way of being so hard to teach
not my place to preach i weave stories instead
lines of rhymes to be sung or be read
a teacher cant teach without the students help
ways to make the masses learn to think only for themselves
----------------------
alabaster glint eyed lady, wearing rapt madness in disgrace wildly laughing mad man wearing the moon as his face..who could be of such gracethe carpet clouds lay low for now but not too near the lines of fear the garden empty
the signpost leers you better turn back
better then that you push forward
are you a seeker or an explorer
to walk before the second sky
to see the moon through closed eyes
feeling the stars from all sides
nothing else could be clear
all of light is and never disappears
the sun lit a smile on my face a saving grace in a time of painthe kind like solace in the coldest of rainmy spirit forlorn for love that burnspiping endlessly the words sound the samethe echo the answer my self is the blame
all along the path iv walked
those prints stay mine no matter how else i look
a leading domino iv always been
knock me down but i get up again
i cause what i bring
i am my own king my own master my own offspring
i am a nice guy when im thinking of being
but many mistakes along the way
so many mistakes theres no way to say
no way to write or type or transcribe all the hurt and painful lies
the sweetest eyes iv brought to tears
for what reason why? ignorance lust love greed and fear
is there any body that hasnt done similar here?
we all are human
why are we so harsh rather then so open
i see my father an i want to confide in him
i know we all have problems it baffles me why
nor what to do to fix the whole mess
i love us all and i try not to have regrets
iv learned my best from my mistakes
and every new one i make i try to change my stride
after all thats all i can really do
and thats all i would ask of you
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
how i wonder what words... would be fit?to describe the feelings, such as theseinescapable moments of tragedy the pain of seeing what time does to mewith best intentions i thought bad thoughtstime allowed awhile for the age old rot
i realized it but late enough to suffer some more
my spirit sleeping at the door
life tends to me i tend to it
my spirit free , my body sick
a complicated puzzle..
i am working to solve it
but it is so hard you see
wondering if every other is a reflection of me
it used to make me lonely
but i thought it selfish to think me the only
so i realized we all
were separate reflections of the same star
i wonder what exactly we are
sometimes i wonder a bit too far
all the while the pain surmounts
is it too late to heal?
i feel some doubt the way i feel
i get it, the message is really
iv learned my lessons of the past
i feel the pain today that lasts
i wish to move on and let us grow
the you in me i seek to know
broken from having a need for a fixi am sick of this constant paini want some numbing comfort for my brainthe nostalgic bliss that cold warm opium kissiv long sworn off the likes of thisbut all pains the same when it returns to remain
adding up and closing in
until discomfort is all thats been
stuck within my damaged being
still alive while barely breathing
all this pain still worth feeling
despite not seeing a reason for my life
i endure the pain and sacrifice
loving what i must let go
learning what i need to know
i take my time as though it were mine
it all slips away so fast
the pain of today will soon be the past
i quietly endure
knowing that less is better then more
--------------------------------
++++++++++++++++++++
whispering willows carry a soundless voice cross the plainsthe mountains hear the echothe thunder hears the raindo all these things hear me i wonder.. as i softly sighno one to ask if its the gods that thunderno one knows the wheres or whys
still i speak still i question
the meaningless answers fall down from the sky
and all the rain drops seek the sea
under the surface such density
its clear to me
theres so much more then meets the eyes
all of it with reason
it comes full circle between the lines
)_______________________________
i am a vibration rolling down the mountain siderushing through the valley down the rivers ripples through the water into the seai am all the fishall the water
all the land
i am just me
listening to allman brothers is absolute bliss with hash an coffee
but my cup is empty till tomorrow another time another chance
till tomorrow sweet dreams god speed my i glimpse another glance
_)_________
celebrity jargon all on tvthe lies and the secretes the next "new" big thingpropaganda the same no matter which side you are listening toanother distorted view only think for yourself to decide what is true
because no matter what anyone ever said
who knows what anyone ever knew
like knew for sure
we can only glimpse the visions beyond the minds door
but how do we describe the sights that do not meet the eyes
a greater meaning to all these things
its all a riddle im still solving
___________________
nothing never was anything at allthen what of me started building the wallsuspicions of all the people i meet an seeeven when i feel they are all meover thinking seems to be wildly prevalent like fish in the sea
such diversity
a meaning to grasp
with respect for the past
knowledge earned from lessons passed
forgiveness at last?
inevitably, becoming to be
_____________________
my sweetest tangerine , yearning for the honeydew taste of you i daydream myself in knotsenvisioning your soft brown auburn falling locks such gentle eyes as you softly sigh an look awaygracing your skin evokes feelings i know not how to sayit means the world
holding you tight around your curves
i cherish each breath i expend to caress your delicate form
you fuel the fire within me that burns
the eternal flame of desire illuminates my soul
in your beauty i see the meaning of getting old
an the value of being young
appreciating each hour we spend happy in the sun
i carry faith our saving grace
making the best of this place with such good company
isnt exactly all that hard when youre with me
and at the end of the day when i hold you in my arms it all goes away
the pain an madness an sadness gives way
to the warmth of love
that lights the way
_)_________________
our hope capsized an love surfaced from the tidesfor all the right reasons a brave sailor fishing outta seasonin the sands of time we stand as waves of uncertainty bury our planted feetsomeday tomorrow and today will finally meet till the sun rises in the west i may only suspect whats to comeafter all its all iv done thats led me here
not walking the plank on some lonely peir
but radiating, the warm love so near
no reason for fear in this life as i see it
even if its not truth i choose to believe it
we are all we are
an can only figure so far into the dark
the lessons there are the warmth of our heart
to be the light an shed the gloom
we the savior of our doom
_____________________
an if we all spoke in time,with humbled words of matching rhyme.would we communicate with the words unsaid?expressing ideas rather then describing their details insteadso much time is lost
exasperating ineffable thoughts
on down the rabbit hole as we do say
no matter how we try itd take forever and a day
if only there were an easier way...
for ideas to convey mutual realization is the only way
and till that day ill wander on
amusing the others with handmedown song
_______________________
3/21/12
my life spent forever in pleasure from the comfort mixed with pain an misery distrusting all the signs i see with faith within mei realize once more...carefully approaching i peered pass the door
and the sunlight spilled on my face
till the rain washed away, the winters silence was its voice
a dreadful slumber has tied we down
all are lost , none are found
hope resounds a reason for us being here
all is reflection
as a star may flash an disappear
another fraction of light somewhere else may appear
all a lesson for us to learn
the way can not be taught it must be earned
to discern the truth from all of the lies
we need to question why we cry
why we laugh , why we sigh
why we are living
why do we die
all of these questions we answer alone
at least until the truth to us is shown
-----------------------------------------
an i said to the moon who are you my blue dream? and the moon whispered "life's not as it seems," all of these stories you've found in your head.. all of the time, living an dead" lost in wonder from the words it had said
i recall all the words i had read of the days passed before.
all the people that had crossed through that door as the minds eye gaped.
truth always waits to show its face yet the truth is clear in the details always near.. without seeing them they disappear before our eyes.
distracted by propaganda's lucid ties to our souls..
how well they know how to take control. their power i fight,
i need no one to tell me wrong from right..
their rules built to uphold self truths..
may i be the wicked rebel.
id rather be of light then another commercial devil.
__________________________________________
not so lonely , being the onlynot much choice except all our seperate voicesoh no i say theres no way its all just us1 is too much
as they say
as i say no way
how lonely id be
being the only i see
thats the reason others be
what a selfish way to see
i think to ourself "me"
life is too magical too diverse id say
to see that it was oneness is true in some way
but there must be variety some fracture of the soul
to give so many molds , so many folds in the fabric of time
could it be one soul?
the shattered divine,
its all the good with all the bad
all youve wished for or ever had
the way of life
the pleasure in strife
all the things that keep us here
or feed our fear
never the victims of some mass appeal
our feelings surreal
no longer worth numbing enough not to feel
its all as should be an will be anyway
till theres tomorrow there is always today
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
fog as oily as the night drifts without soundforming images in ghastly lightfrom the farrow fields of grainto the highest mountains carried on a wind of changeour hope remains
the omnipresent
the past , the present
the future, an whats more?....
what lay in wait beyond the minds door
_______________________________
3/17/12
i beg of the raven winter, bring us comfort in the nightthe moons glow so heavy, waning from our sightdesert spring this time of yearapril showers rain dreams alleviate my painas my thoughts disappear reflecting on a world less then clear
what strange irony has landed me here
i question to myself almost every hour of each day
which inevitably slips away
without answer but only clues
which have no instruction of use
albeit all in my head
no one that follows is led
each choice is our own
even though the way may be shown
its up to us to step forward
or to digress or be progressive explorers
life is a whirlwind of change
all the while everything stays basically the same
_+++++++++++++++++++++++
3/16/12
spring from life the virgin flower..like a tattered bumble bee, rapt in the joy of the sun.never too distracted to keep busy living its short life on the run.on the fly im sure it often wonders why its doing what it doesat least i do.. just because
now is forever as far as the bee may know
likewise its all my reality really shows
here a moment, gone forever
for now im escaping the inevitable moment of never?
my thoughts however lead me to believe
everything is as it should be
perhaps possibly never neverever comes
we may just begin once we are done
but not the same life for everyone
rather an ever expanding varitey
like intricate patterns and their endless complexity
i wonder whats to be
perhaps destiny or whats meant to be
the fate for me
or free will at last
"how do i get there
without any path?"
the path not walked for its in your head
whats the use of life living it dead
i was sleeping all the time while awake
i was waking up to sighs of laughter in misery that made my soul shake
the voices were all me speaking to others out loud
fathers mothers sisters an brothers forgive and allow
the letting go the one that knows
reality shows a myriad of dis-ease
only to show us what loves us once pleased
karma our release
Complete all soul assignments before the next show
at least the voices are letting us know
its all in our heads
living or dead
learn your lessons an do your part
you are the light
you are the dark
__________________________
love it up, cosmic saviors.. cherish your delight. tend to the flame with the tinder of your sight. pay heed of omens leave faith for no man.. sometimes i cant even understand all the presures i withstand.. the power of love can mend any heart, penetrating light through the deepest dark. to our souls i pray, may we make peace with everyday.. making best use of our time remembering to remind, there are always more lessons here to find. our paths are our own but take heed of all the directions youre shown.. our faith is our own but listen so all ears may hear you in turn. the way of love is not scorn but gentle approach.. let divine love be thy coach. always thinking of what the other is feeling as if we all were all ourself.. pay mind to everything with a thought for the common health.
__________________________
Feelings unnamed of the soul untamed
do not shut this out,there is meaning for all that is here.have faith.. do not doubt,be calm.. do not in fear.always the question, why are we here?
we make our own meaning, while we are here
judging each other or judging ourselves
in the end it wont matter
poverty or wealth
whatever we feel
whoever we healed
whenever we kneeled an begged while we prayed
that it could all be okay
actually caring when we wished someone a good day
it never always was this way
so many distractions to keep our souls at bay
i hear them everyday
behind all the sheltered eyes an quiet smiles
inside everybody's inherent denials
an ineffable vastness of secretes in full bloom
cycles of life reflected on the moon
a terrible sadness mixed with gladness and joy
vaguely aware of something inexplicable and coy
knowing without knowing in this great chaotic dance
no longer do i wonder if it could all be explained as chance
seeing a fire of madness softly burning in my calm blue sea
realizing there is no separation between all the likes of me
_____________________________________________
a writers block invoked by pot
the kind that makes me sink , like water and a rock
a clouded mind mixed with pain
quiets the souls vibratory sustain
the words my wonder do sublime
through limiting stagnation that poisons the mind
thinking the paths are neverending
motionless here i am standing
at the crossroads inevitably again
i can barely recall
where i start and where i end
_____________________________
a block i find has crossed my mind
i found myself betwixt space an time
day by day i learn an grow
while the universe quietly shows
theres more to life
beyond our strife
our paper money an material paradises
without meaning
without feeling
awakened dreaming
perhaps in time this block will pass
as i know today will not last
only now i know for sure
thankful for what i have but as always i want more
_________________________
a lot of pain , a lot of pressure
from the darkness.. a light softly blooms
speaking too soon for all the right reasons
anticipating the changes unexpected of seasons
what merry men must hold behind
laughing smiles all the time
our grimaced flesh an worn polished teeth
ever so fragile in time
like the castles of youth we made by the beach
carrying stress in our jaws
rapt sober by laws
sickened by dis-ease
begging for comfort we plead
to the invisible god we need
while the visible falls to pieces
destruction inevitably the effect of creation the cause
begging while choosing our straws
painful pleasure our cup of tea
learn to take it peacefully
our sweet relief from within
its up to us its always been
hear all voices but speak thy own
reconsider all thats shown
forgetting to remember
remembering to learn
life is a process
our progress we earn
pay respect to how youve grown
it takes time for meaning to be shown
our patterned lives are stepping stones
whats to come from what begun
the earth the sun
a cosmic dance
just like you and i
our loves romance
_________________
an its been said he will call us up in the air
i take it as a metaphor for realizing what is there
what really matter to all of us here
why there is no reason to fear
why we walk the miles going no where
our love we must share
to remember the lonely wild old days
to realize its better living this way
loving the self an all others the same
from the divine source we all came
all of us follow our own path of change
for good or ill , we are to blame or thank
our own wisdom to rise from the depths where we sank
the common themes we go through in all of our dreams
all of the things.. great, big or small
likewise the spiral, rises an falls
together in all
we slowly unwind
finding ourselves again time after time
________________________
an old man in tatters came to me today..
he begged i listen to his words
said hear me when i say.. there is no dark like the day
our night light cities burn with life
for the light, ebb an flow we sacrificed
society names our price
our souls we sell for our idea of paradise
they control they will
their paper money brain wash spell
all the things they make us want
to distract us from what we are doing
as their abusing our lives as slaves
using us day by day
so far from gods way
consumerism the devils work some men say
raving madman in the dark of day
crying out to look in here
before what you cherish does disappear
never fear what will always come
thy will be started
thy will be done
ashes to ashes
dust to dust
did you need the cash that much?
________________
our radiant dandy
all strange order of monsters
we welcome you to our procession
what bring us now, to this trembling ground
what meets the ear, to disappear
the middle a circle, the beginning the end
what is the difference? the lives we defend..
the suspect the victim, self inflicted wounds to mend
for now truth is not clear
but i do not pretend
faith, my friend
forever, again
++++++++++++++++++++++
love unexpressed
my only regrets
how i bang against the walls
gazing through the barred windows
into their lonely halls
the curtain falls everytime our eyes meet
to their souls i beseech
a way of thinking i can not teach
a deeper meaning no words reach
the soul salvation i solemnly preach
may i.. say i.. love you a thousand times more?
would it penetrate the cracks in your door?
my friend, my sister, my brother, my mother
i call on you again.. look inside and discover.
the love of no other but the self will suffice
despite all else that we defend or sacrafice
always think twice or three times or four
whenever theres less believe that theres more
searching for a reason
making do each season
our love resounds with feeling
as the years are reeling
our lives of wakened dreaming
abstract meaning
day to night
night to day
seems its always been this way , if only here
the truth of it all someday will be clear
_)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
2/27/12
if it werent for the beauty there would be no valor in suffering
to grin at the sunrise despite what the night took
to dream while life is unbearable
there is something so perfect to it all
its the maze my mind constantly walks
circling 'round
the answer above an below
but never where my mind goes
into the unknown
new days with relative deja vus being shown
these thoughts that have grown
their seeds remain still
balancing the dark an light
as they forever will
__________
_________________
what can i say to you my friend
you've run down your own dead end
no where left to turn
besides every bridge you've prior burned
takes time to learn
lessons towards mending
no cause for defending , the self from the self
neglecting our health by wasting our time
forgetting theres a reason for every rhyme
reflections of yours are mine
no one else left to blame
only your lonely self
isolated, to change...
____________________
an ode to the quarter moon
around every light darkness looms
though up is also down
nothing is above nor below
nothing but what we do an where we go
oh silent night i love thee so
all of the wonder that passes so slow
days reflecting like never before
the light i experienced beyond the door
seeking to be, seeking to see.. as much as i do believe
and so much more
the futures always close
the meaning seems too far
searching for a rhyme to the riddle
while the piper plays the fiddle
to a tune no man can hear
but only feel
not with a dream nor a whisper
or a mystic spell
to reach heaven you have to cross hell
and my loved ones, i wish us well
may our love dispel hate
may we have patience to wait and faith to push on
together we are strong
moraltiy automaticly sorted (right from wrong)
gods love is true as god loves you
for this reason thou Should love thyself
just as well
we are all in this thing together
you are myself that i know better
reflections get their meanings across
its up to us..
which to keep , which to toss
________________
show me an answer an ill draw you the question,
all our wonder to keep us still guessing?
thoughts of heaven
memories of hell
such is the life iv come to know well
the chance mystery
a blessing from unknown
for this reason i am patient for truth to be shown
all that wonder forbids and allows
the unknown whispering too loud
there an then , here an now
____
all is reflection with a reason
every scene we are seeing a deeper meaning
another myself, what cause for our being?
i wonder with such feeling...
awake in my eternal dreaming
every lesson to learn , finding my soul in others eyes
all the fuels that'v been burned.. by the fires of our desire's
__
so it seems to me
we might just have to believe, in dreams
maybe life is not just what it seems
i believe.. but im not sure what to believe in, again
i find myself telling myself not to let myself pretend , again
i know i have to feel it from within
iv been where ever for as long as never
return to sender
PS. my soul of we
a long lost memory of being to be
a drop in the sea
a crystal key to the palace
reminiscent of VALIS
i try not to distract my mind from the facts
when nothing is proof nothing is truth
all things are false as time ticks away
the inevitable days as chemistry ensues
laying in my biomachine iv damaged and abused
scars lasting lessons
the suffering pain doorways to heaven
the keys to the kingdom handed down the line
father of mine reflections of time
the seeds that were silent all burst into bloom an decay
feeding the earth for seeds to thrive other days
the circles of time remind theres no other way
hard to have everything without all anyway
all things with reason
a hope for each season
moving forward getting past
from the start to the last
the present mystery of the past
the moment changes life rearranges
an i pause to wonder once more
anxious approaching i creep towards the door
quiet i knock then turn key to the lock
throwing the windows open wide
circle rings in the sands of time
the doorway illuminates a silent lesson
all our wonder, to keep us guessing
___________
well my friend all we are is a picture in a mirror
times lines on our faces showing clearer
for all our worry theres no hold on our freedom
inevitably sometimes we just need to see things
an i know theres always a reason
beyond those false lives we believe in
i knew the stories told long time ago
i heard your voices flow from where i do not know
its a wild road an we gotta keep seeking
cant stop an wait enough to embrace the feeling
the winter changes by the time spring rearranges
our seeds we maintenced as our spirits flourished
our bodies machines for our souls fatal voyage
living the life betwixt the minds maze
perceiving reality by some touch of grace
pain an pleasure
learning as we go , protecting by building defenses
walkin away from ways we used to know
we tear down the walls we built up to hide scars
Open the Door
let your love in
always be seeking the peace from within
not living without
we love but not to let go
we love what we get to know
the moment of never
eventually we will get there
the time of becoming
give up our jaded ways
an stop our endless running
our ways of numbing as diverse as our minds
receiving radios for the divine
recalling the times of being before
seeing the light glowing beyond the minds door
i symbolize the key
becoming to be
reaching inside hoping to find
what was left was right all the time
your love is mine
its a handmedown the thoughts are broken
for what its wroth i offer this token
blessing of light
i rise to the sun an bow to the night
for our love i write
namaste my friend, its good to see you again
you thought that i had run away
before the mirror here il stay
the voices quietly say its all in my head
im living im dead
theres no reason to fear
its all a gift to be here
in the only an the only
keepin the self from being lonely
loving the one
the many rays reflecting from the sun on the moons brilliant face
our satalite echoes our phases
gravitational pulls on the tides of all oceans to all nations
all one on all
the planet earth
a mission of becoming
to test our souls worth
enduring the strife
embracing sacrafice
for the love of all one
helpiing the others for karmas return
it takes time to burn
entrophy a lesson to learn
appreciating the fleeting
we give thanks for our being
we give thanks for our feeling
we give thanks for our breathing
we give thanks for our hearing
the air the trees the soft sweet smells sights and sounds
the beauty that surrounds
the light in the dark
the dark in the light
all of the things that cause wrong from right
a balance to all
a hole in the wall
if we can not seek , how do we hear the calling
how to motivate the stalling
every problem not worth solving
simplicity the key to the game
living believing in truth
while there never is any proof
faith is acceptance at best
life not for living full of regrets
but trying our best
stoping to clean up all of our mess
doing to do
loving true reflections of you
___________
the narrow way
a steep incline
quickly we fall
slowly we climb
pushing furthur
hoping to find
whatever mystic left us behind
while i couldnt ask for better
appreciating the weather
the falls on me but i dont mind when it feels fine
a greener hill beyond the mountain yonder
a better future to ponder
how i wander as im still
should i wonder? as i will
truly a sight to see
becoming, to be
_+++_+_+__
society you sicken me
a travesty to see
the imperfections we let be
a part of the.. undefinable quality of harmony
our perils glee
desperately free
wondering whats to be
all the while making it so|
as we are, letting go
______
sometimes it makes no sense to cross tolerance with ignorance
a common defense, the love of the soul
being young and getting old
seeking control over life
once or twice sacrificing for paradise
the cost of the price
7 billion to 1
the son of the sun
heaven help me
dear lord i pray
give me the strength to face the day
i try my best to endure the tests
giving my love to the rest of the flock
i vow i will not stop an give up the good fight
i know your light will return me through any night
iv been sworn to this battle long ago
resisting thought control
with thou on my side never again will i let my light hide
surrender the titles of false overgrown idols
let go control of far diminished limiting molds
anticipation of growing old gives way to lamenting youth
seeking truth exposes the lies
relinquishing doubts by opening eyes
we pretend to realize
all good things in all good time
yours is mine...
_
+++++++++++++_)((O*&(&UH
2/2/12
whisky, beer, bourbon an rum
hashish, blue dream, afghani
bubbling bong
yearning not to be numb
but as high as the sun
shining all one
bid the sun rise
wipe off shadows from your sleep
wash your loving hair by the creek of becoming
thinking of something
far beyond the minds of men
the likes from which we descended
as we are mending
the separate sides back to one
the love of the sun
always shining bright
even in the dark stillness of the longest cold winter night
second sight fading fast
back to daily life as long as my living may last
______________________________
))1/31/12
token delight
seasoned by timeless night
the spirit soars
wanting of more...
the wide eyed believer
closing eyes to see clearer
straight through our sorrow,
our self induced darkened hollow
far beyond deceiving sacrifice,
the price of life
never falter when youre weary
future scary when there is no comfort here
no way out clear
the ultimatum prison cell
saturn ascends
choose one or ten
saturn ascends
hang on or be humbled again
__
1/30/12
what is it i want
a new comfort that cant be bought
that cant be taught
what cant be learned
must be earned
skill not a given
hope the key to wisdom
patiently entering the kingdom
as ever slowly becoming
the something from nothin
_________________
rooted i am
stoned with the earth..
in stillness truth rings sublime
my voice echos through the canyons of my mind
all things lost in due time
all things gifted
everythings fine
everything i must witness
gods forgiveness
a chance remittance
from the stars on far
our love await
at dawns gates the sun sets a golden jewel in the sky
so as the sun goes down i say find yourself
find yourself today
an tell me i said high
time to die to live again
to pretend were here to mend the two sides
while we hide behind covers of another
the truth to discover theres no separation
though all we see is you is me
but we are still apart asleep awake alight in the cold dark ...
i so often wonder whats the reason
with the pass of each season my need to know lessens bit by bit
as i learn to let live and appreciate it
i feel true freedom the likes of which before i had only seen within
_______________
miles of wild trees
undisturbed by the likes of these
folks that build roads
seeking more control
by the lonely darkside of the road...
these trees grow old
watching on in silent disbelief
oh what we do to their fellow trees..
their rotted leaves litter the ground
all the fresh green left farrow brown
without a sound i hear their cry
with them in wonder
i ponder , why.. why.. why?
_________
the silent gates past the aether
the cosmic receiver in tune with the believer
a sense of knowing whats see through
a window growing to peer through
to see whats true
me is you as you are I, separation the age old lie
truth hides , within blind faith... truth waits,
for no man to understand
a plan a reason
beyond seeing beyond awake
not dreaming
for what is lost, is all thats found
dust to dust on scattered ground
love resounds
_______
1/29/12
when the creator is the created in the creation
whats the reason whats the cause
light an love
falling stars
birth an death.. you might recall all the rest
big bang ... black hole
starting over... getting old
as each star will form and die
clouds like ripples in the sky
water flowing .. ancient omen
spring summer fall .. winter come round for all
again and again
feel the earth spin
another rock in the sky
another vessel for you and I
how many times have we been here before
let love in
open the doors
____________
1/26/12
we are nowhere , and it is now
now where are we?
somewhere else that started it all over
some far flung off spring of a species of planet rovers
in the genetics hides omens
our history sorted at best
somehow we survived all the tests
our forms not like the rest of the animals here to adorn our beautiful world
may be we are meant to explore and learn more
may be we are the ones we are looking for
perhaps the light is ourself beyond the minds door
what's this life for?
why do i wonder.. as time slips away
why do i question though i feel blessed for each day
may be i made it this way
may be it always has been
if i am not without
then i am not within
(wondering more this morning on the origins of man
seems far older then the planet earth and influenced to say the least
for what its worth it feels to me that whatever we are we predate the earth and that we just happen to be here now.. like seeds planted that grew. that as its too much improbability to wrap my head around.. speaking of probability in such an improbable world though is laughable to say the least. my yearning to know the truth tells me eventually inevitably somehow i/we will know
till then i can only wonder :) )
________
1/23/12
what radiant jewels adorn the night
the days bright clamor obscures their sight
their soul takes flight as eve draws near
where the days harsh lines do disappear
drifting off to sleep, absolved by the peace of inner wealth
the cosmic self nurtures an refines
the challenging lessons remind of all the answers we find in endless reflection
such divine perfection must be at work
i have faith in my lifes worth
a grand plan much bigger then i am
yet i know i am equal to the whole
i resolved not to have to know
but have faith
love an let love an let go
all with much love
ya know
______________
all about with reason
all along the line
everything im seeing
seems to come in due time
everything lasts while everythings leaving
like the seasons
our selves the trees
our lives the leaves
and we shed to remain
we stay the same to change
from the cycles we are made
our failures saved
our hopes realized
always truth and never lies
we compromise to live in zen
letting light in as much as dark will allow
forgetting how to control the tide
refuse to hide
from the others torment
the rampant storm that pervades the mind
lessons in rhyme all with great meaning
everything fleeting
as all that we cherish is leaving
we breathe through our health
watching the unwinding of our timeless cosmic self
)))))))))))))))))))))))))
what dreams may wait
beyond the side of the sunlit hills
an echo of a distant voice
through the window on the wall
the air hangs heavy an light
a feeling of surrealy being not there
knowingly unknowing
unfathomably aware
it just has a feeling a sense of completion
singularity still has me reeling as i approach the calm center
the beginning of never
how our fate echoes the weather
the rain in decemember clearing away
the snow falls so perfect remarking the day
the hush of winter falls with the snow keeping noises at bay
in this stillness the voices within us speak up so loud
soundlessly they resound
speaking of all the times we have been before
all the times we stepped through the door
the memories flood back
knowing beyond facts
faith now replaced
caught in rapture awe struck our saving grace
life not a race
but a study we cant replace
time wont wait but happen again
our destructive creator were slowly spiraling in
our ultimate fate lays far away
but time has no meaning lost in this reeling
still the cause im seeing of our being
is our ultimate end as well
the singularity that birthed us our universes fate as well
a black hole the big bang
its happened before itll happen again
forever an ever
spiraling in
____________________
1/15/12 Talez of becoming , something from nothin
wild eyed salty sea beast , jackoroses salior saint an judas christ
the keeper of the black wings of the north wood, the student of the night
telling stories of olden wisdom an what his sails were set for
the lessons from the kingdom an other vistas he explored
we are summoned to the night
we are greeted by the dawn
the time of becoming
something from nothing before too long
the forests echo with laughter of our forefathers that cometh before
passion overtaking emotions as we peer through the door
yesterdays tomorrows becoming todays
cycles of becoming going back before years months an days
the talez of the ole ways
while the story teller speaks
we dream of what he tries to teach
his joy is to share light , an not disaster
_____________
its already overthough its only beguncaught in singularity spiraling towards all one backwards from where we started fromback to the end to begin again
lingering on the event horizon forever within a dream of not knowing
yet growing and dying and multiplying
swinging on the spiral of infinity denials of living a dream
reality not as it seems but so much more
glimmering the light beyond the minds door
_____________
In the Quiet abandon The Child has grownLessons of ReturningWhere ever he wanders is homeDestine to roam
Searching each Road
The answers are close
But always Furthur behind
Peering through the veil
Searching to find
Rhymes of riddles
memories beyond time...
Whatever it all is
It feels like its all mine
_______
1/15/12
Dream-So here we are..Life or something like itEmbrace or fight itTake the key
Open the doors
Less of what youre wanting
More of what you deserve
Answer-less are many
While the answers are aplenty
Its all in our head
The devils an the gods
The living and the dead
No separation but unity instead
So whats this mean?
Some odd dream....
Awoke by distant thunder
In the back of my mind i whisper "no wonder"
)____________________
1/09/12
stop making sensefor the sake of toleranceignorance a comforting numbing blissa blanket of ticks atrophy of control letting go of letting go
seeking to know
hoping to find
nowhere reminds of somewhere divine
somehow i am thine as thine is mine
my own images i behold
far more then meets the eyes of my mold
my body young to old
like all the lives iv lived before
opening and closing the door
spared the suns grace from the window on the wall above my fireplace
i light my own way
with the words i write i say
what all can not be said nor directly read
the meaning between the lines
i form the words
but the rhymes are not mine
____________
1/11/12
tell me your dreams
an ill write you a letter of my fantasy
post script full of my memories of never
paint me a picture of sounds without noise
tell me the colours with your soundless sweet voice
feeling theres no choice
i beg ye forgive my impatience
i meditate to thy greatness i honor thee
seeking to know we cut up the lines
constricting our minds
so tied up within
we always have been
on the path of knowing
nothing for sure is showing
but we take step in stride
keep moving or be left behind
cycles remind of progression designed to keep us to the path
distractions never last
the truth we must face to pass
life a test we pay to play
what you die from tomorrow you learn from today
thats just the way it goes
once you got it figured
its time to go
___________
1/10/12
more, i adore
less is not enough for what i desire
i need more fuel
more fuel for the fire
let it burn let it burn
i want to use all the fuel
let it burn higher
more is what i adore
always looking for some
more is better then one
_-_____-__--_-____1/09/12
take the dose as a toast to pry your minds eye to see through the lies the ego speaks too much thinks its tough silly human life gets rough when you think the peaks the top your bound to hit the rock bottom to again start from nothing we the something the seeds that grow seeking to know we push closer too the light till its glow is too bright we start to lose control if we cant escape its sight such burning vision stinging clear all the truth we somehow fear when it is the calling we need to hear THATS why we are here! no reason to fear but such acceptance forced upon us.. sense of knowing can only dumb us for once we know we let go of learning our wheels stop turning.. do not know just say maybe possibly probably so is the way things go... after all how much can you really know.. only what you BELIEVE shows an what it means is what we make of it till we know for sure its either we are making it or faking it but all with reason all the hours all the close calls we devour without another thought.. all the false idols we have treasured and sought.. ourselves running from ourselves all along while learning to be strong by yearning to be weak how many left turns turned the wrong way have we went down to seek the right way of being awake but still dreaming alive in our feeling but not much beyond our bubble of our mold.. the material we need as much as we need to let go.. lessons to know, like all things.. more of the same difference realities cycles brings
----------------------
just say maybe
ya cant always know
accept what you see
consider what doesnt show
let go an drop control to see
things from another perspective possibly
eventually
probably
just exactly what we need to see
to let us become what were supposed to be
a drop in the sea
the tide turns the sands away
every minute is every day
every hour that ever was
always is an always will be
as confusing as this may seem
our life may as well be the dream
as real as it seems
becoming to be
___________
there aint no easy answers
but its all simple in hindsight
whats wrong teaching whats right
all the memories running together
scent taste an sight
time let me know better
but not whether its all wrong or right
beyond our life living doesnt stop
knowing so much more beyond shows
we can only accept feel blessed an let go
_____
-got what i asked for , just as i needed
a message the meaning worth heeding
regardless of my reasons of not believing
my sleep waken deadalive dreaming
beginnings to end
foes to friend
wounds to mend
time is healing, if we tend its feeling
doesnt hurt? give it awhile..
eventually denials are overcome with pains disdain
lifes not the same
when all the horror you sought to escape
is your own future an your out of time to wait
______________
i shoulda seen this coming
when i did but didnt, i had no clue
you never do.. what always does?
no one was what no one is
their own existence
the painful bliss
the secrete is
its not you thats me
when there is no separation that our lives let be
a travesty of majesty our perils glee
its not you thats me
how we wonder why are we here
nothing to fear
knowing reminds
you lose things to find
the truth rings sublime
your answer to call
your memories start it all
up against the wall , feelings that cool skin
remembering all iv ever been
all my deeds an sins i bless them too
figuring somethings you just never get used to
now i know better, from the times i didnt weather
to see the change that i know like my name
its never the same but it always is
a treacherous adventure
a token of bliss
_______
I want to hear the sound
not just the hushed waves
I want to open the chasm
not just watch the surface craze
_______________
OPEN the door
jumping through again an again to find my self everytime within
??
at the quiet gates of abandon
stood alone before time knew its name
Cosmos dance
A Drop in the Sea , ENDLESS spiral of infinity
Triangles where each side faces the sun
___________
all the times lost prophets
what have they found?
grave dust an a eulogy.. where their hope may resound.
a dream of a dream of remembering what it was
that started us , that parted us..
as if appearing from above.
forces shove to control each side
though each man hide
behind the cover of another
while ones still the other
no ones left to part
this disturbed him greatly
from the light he stole the dark
_________
ointo the void the lesson of knowing faith in the faithless inevitably growing from every lie fractured the light of truth showing
in a life led faithless we are the faceless no matter the meaning if we cant believe what we are seeing
wondering wisdom struck from divine once again its myself that i find in all of our forms all the times i have died and been born in my mind storming in rhyme
formulate denials for the apparent ordeal never knowing why thats just how i feel can we slow the passing of time can i mend your heart with mine
My boots as dusty as this soul..
For all the memories, my footsteps hold
__________
you can feel it in a winter breeze an see it in the leaves of the summer trees just like another part of me.. ya know its callin but you dont know why a certain something just seemed to catch your eye got you mesmerized... future crawlin outta the days that passed the ones that couldnt last seemed to fade fast, an all the years are rolling into one an all i ever have an havent done, like the moon an sun reflecting light on an on..
_)))))))))))))))))
always again myself that I find
are all our reflections mine?
not our bodies nor our faces
that look in the pupils of far off other places
that mystic shadow on which light just sheens
pools of blackness where all our sights gleamed
radiant jewels adorn our pupils worn like open portals in our eyes
showing so plainly what they do hide
deep in that mystery our true self yet to find
_____
¼/12
love is life
as life is love
love is power
as love is light
light is powerful
as light dispels darkness
darkness chases light
as death wanes life
life waxes death
draining the life we love more and more
just as our affections we adore
a deeper meaning for the separate reflections
to come together to realize divine perfection
our souls oppression
through love our projection grows clearer each day
through all our trials we learn the way
loving the self
realizing our wealth
giving unto others as if they were us
doing things only that are morally just
love is trust
trust in life and trust in god
today's lovers tomorrows fathers and moms
______
only the senseless wouldnt make themselves an would rather be made by somebody else instead.. even if its all in their head, theyd imagine them selves alive but just as well off dead, controlled an forcefed.. its really no use wondering truth when there never is proof in any of this
life's fleeting pain in bliss
a drop in the ocean
a rift in the void
i stand without motion caught in the rain
considering myself alive but insane
________________
12/30/11
so many so many so many people to keep up with
what a world we live in all the connections you make everyday alone
every single self shown and all intertwined
reconnecting to remind
never was a time we were not apart of the cycle
where are all those words to start it all over
remember when 10 dollars showed you the universe?
in my day we had to rhyme in riddles till we knew
now it comes to you
has always been
never was a never before
untill there never was a never before
or how else may it be
apart from probably
something has to give
an we always feel sorry for the horriblebankruptcy attorneysthatblewitupscreweduptheworldforinsuancepolicies
the truth that never was heard
nobody knew thats what the world did till we put it all together
now we see it better but how many truly see
what is sight beyond seeing
what is knowing beyond being
hearing when there is no apparent call though its felt within us all\
something small becomes something great
a gleaming shore a windswept lake
____________
my raging pupils i beg you quiet their silent sustain
they constantly call to me throughout all my change
always to remain, so silent i adore them as they call to me the same
every fleeting reflection bearing my name
to the soul my reflection coos I AM
even when i deviate from the path it all goes to plan
my feet planted in the sand as the tides shift my stance
my sorrow fear love an wonder alone in my mind,
while the cosmos have no pause from their dance
may each day be my only chance i try the best i can
an somehow i tell myself it matters
even if i am only a man
)))))))))))))
i wanna do what i do
ya know i do it for me
though i do it for us
i know i do it for me..
i want to feel free to take a dive into ecstasy,
away from me, by moving closer to see.. what all will be, eventually..
A separate drop of an infinite sea of divinity..
our equality equates to never having to wait
but always having time to find what really matters..
what was lost? what was gathered?
does it matter?
no more lines..
the words as old as all of the rhymes
)))))))))))))))
of all these thoughts exploding through doors,
i often wonder if less is more.. what is life for?
the never ending circling of our southward deadend highway of mending..
no cause defending our merit in life, we all face our personal sacrafices..
to break doubts ice, hopes fire must burn..
dont let it die with each turn of the wheel
I try to hold on try to stay strong as i let go
i am seeking to know as i let it be..
appreciating all around me while not wanting the wanting but wanting of more
though i adore all iv found as its all iv looked for..
alas i always want more, calming myself i hold tight on my reigns
so much of life changes by staying the same
all in due time nothing remains..
as it goes all a part of the game i am so glad i play,
no matter what im thankful of each god given day.
________________
I want to push the limits
I want to bend the lines
I want to take the dose to redefine my mind
Drifting through my lessons to find the way to remind
Of all those days that slipped away so fast
I want to make that wonder last
the wonder lust
For all the wonder i pay the cost
Wandering lost as i am found
Hope resounds a deep meaning
Everything seeming connected like the seasons
Though i may only be dreaming
Still i appreciate the feelings
))))))))))))))))))))
12/22/11
outside a warning the morning the dawn.. inside im yearing disturbing the right in the wrong. the fatal storm breaking to calm, the clouds making way for the light of the sun. inside all one there is no other, each self is another you and me mother and brother the father divine.. the spiral of light, higher we climb.. your love is mine
________________
12/21/11
you dug your grave, your soul to save.. its no better no matter where you lay. here to stay so make the best of it. theres no rest from it, the eternal struggle.. onward we muddle for the riches our souls sickness the wanting of more.. the more we adore when we hold plenty, the loss of many on the road of becoming.. slowly we climb the something from nothing
___
12/20/11
any time now youll wake up
its all real because nothing is
everything is because it isnt
it was all a mistake anyway
lets do it again
~
can we go back?
have you been born yet and are you alive
how did we get here?
where are we going? ... to the other side of morning
all things promised
all things missing
are we only entitled to what we are given
is surviving living
what is life without sacrifice
nothing is free if we always pay the price
thinking twice of every conceived notion
in my thoughts breed omens
and once dreamed reality wasnt as it seemed
pandora's box opened as i gleamed
a golden hall adorned with crystals
granite and pearl inlaid walls
a hallowed space
looking in the mirror
my worn face stares back at me
an older version gazing at the younger me
becoming just to be
__
Words i do wonder, lines i do rhyme
Building ideals in symbols and signs.
Ways to remind of left behind knowledge,
The starting of stopping, something from nothing...
The cycle remains while everything changes by staying the same.
Life's game we play again and again with new names
It's never the same and it always is a trial of bliss
The grace of gods kiss still fresh on our unknowing lips
From the well we do sip the waters of becoming
As we learned crawling an running all things advance in due time
Our romance does remind of the love and intention that birthed mankind
Our perfect design the vehicle for our souls obsession
Our blessing of not knowing always to keep us still guessing
----------------
it takes alot to take alot
though alot is all you got
whether you know it or not
it doesnt stop it doesnt start
with every beat of every heart
and every gasp of every breath
the cosmic self
the omni present
the pits of hell
the kingdom of heaven
7 11 44 13
what does it all mean
duality some kind of dream
the yin the yang were caught up somewhere in between
an when realize
an see without eyes
they say thats where zen lays
_)))))))))))))))))))))))
12/16/11
all about with reason
all along the line
everything im seeing
seems to come in due time
everything lasts while everythings leaving
like the seasons
our selves the trees
our lives the leaves
and we shed to remain
we stay the same to change
from the cycles we are made
our failures saved
our hopes realized
always truth and never lies
we compromise to live in zen
letting light in as much as dark will allow
forgetting how to control the tide
refuse to hide
from the others torment
the rampant storm that pervades the mind
lessons in rhyme all with great meaning
everything fleeting
as all that we cherish is leaving
we breathe through our health
watching the unwinding of our timeless cosmic self
____________
12/12/11
wondering of whats to come
I want to believe times not done
realizing its all one
no end nor a beginning of the line
living through clockwise the circle of time
knowing this am I too far ahead or running behind
always again myself that I find
are all our reflections mine?
not our bodies nor our faces
that look in the pupils of far off other places
that mystic shadow on which light just sheens
pools of blackness where all our sights gleamed
radiant jewels adorn our pupils worn like open portals in our eyes
showing so plainly what they do hide
deep in that mystery our true self yet to find
___
(random incomplete bits)
when all our eyes realize
in the end
we count our foes as we count our friends
Keep in mind the good an bad we did defend
an see the light in what we could not mend
+-
I went out late one night
the winter moon shining bright
walkin down beside the road
nowhere to go I cant go home
iv been this way a thousand times
my way back I can never find
one missed step, your sure to fall
when your down who hears you call
WEST by EAST
NORTH by SOUTH
No matter where the compass point
no matter how things seem disjointed
an there was a town
drugged up and run down
no one stayed out past night
an everyone there seemed to fight
an where is that place I used to know
where the cool calm waters always flowed
its dried up here on the coldest night of the year
___
Nirvana-
What else could I see?
all a part of me…
why cant you show me something else?
something beyond myself…
in the sun, in the sun
we are all one…
forever looking for the projection of our reflected lives
always we pay the price
inevitably the constant sacrifice our love lives and possessions
Hey, Wait,
how do we cherish what is fleeting
Hey, Wait,
how do we keep hold of what is leaving
___
12/12/11
(think i wrote this to queen jane approximately)
Wandering about without dreaming
touching each other without feeling
all the people saying words no voices ever said
lines from the books no eyes have ever read
an I guess its all they ever told you
an its just the way everyone tries to control you
well your tired of their rules an all of your creation
wont you consider how things change
wont you consider how things change
it cant always be just the way they want it to be
with all this endless possibility
there aint nothing stopping me or you
from doin anything we want to
+___
in our madness we reach sublime
to the light we crawl and climb
when our sorrow fills us with doubt
its up to faith to cast those doubts out
through another electric night
our spirits race to reach the sights
that lonely tower inside we dwell
past heavens gates an pits of hell
a separate place beyond such grace
the observatory of the soul
looking out as we grow old
into our timelessness of being
finally truly seeing
life is above believing
living is whatever we are feeling
but all with great meaning
awake in our dreaming
Down on luck an ailing, just as troubled as could be
I went down to the devil wondering just to see
he said I can help you out my friend, I swear your just like me
you can have anything you want an be anything you want to be
all I ask of you my boy is only all you are
that whiskey drinkin demon is tempting
but you better off take ware
sell your soul an all those earthly riches someday you will not care to hold
an then you will find all that money you got to hold cant fill up the hole
of your precious soul you so foolishly let go
____
Rivers an trees, Like the fractals of the leaves
Fingers reaching further
Flowers growing higher
Toward the one our sun
Many the path from the one
Diverging upwards towards the sun
Entwining we climb
Perplexing through time
Living life divine
Many the lives with our own is entwined
A constant presence
A cosmic essence
We are Star~Dust, We are Golden, We are billion year old Carbon!
An we got to get ourselves back to the Gar~Eden!
__
Desolation Row-
while calypso singers flirt with sailors
making light of their far gone memories..
they lure em in with the sweet songs they sing,
when they ought to let them be
except for the romance enthused
who traded everything one could lose
just to prove love was true
an it alone was enough to use
now the seeker the found
an all the whirlwinds pushing down
on the outskirts of freedoms den again
an i dont know why we have to cry or sing
it is all as it should be
we are all in good company
no ones perfect we're all the same
no ones at fault no ones to blame
pay mind to what you choose
cherish what you use
nothings promised nothing remains
in time we will lose all we gain
its just another circular street
an another stoned deadbeat
so practice what you preach
what cant be learned you cant teach
watching the sun go down
feeling the earth spin round
hearing without sound
seeing what cant be found
now is the time that always has been
now is the way it all is within
so this is the song that i sing
this is the message i bring
always look out by looking in
)))))
12/08/11
awaking from a sigh..
viewing the mirror,
i wonder why.
gazing into my own eyes,
immortal reflection.
my pupils hollow reflection of a deeper truth
keeping my faith with no shred of proof
i settle for knowingly not knowing
with no reason showing
i live my life of sacrafice
giving my love to soothe all our strife
i cherish the pain and sadness the same as the joys in life
all the heartache and all the joy amount to the wonder of life i knew as a boy
_))))))___
always again myself that i find
are all our reflections mine?
not our bodies nor our faces
that look in the pupils of far off other places
that mystic shadow on which light just sheens
pools of blackness where all our sights gleamed
radiant jewels adorn our pupils, worn like open portals in our eyes
showing so plainly what they do hide
deep in that mystery our true self yet to find
__
12/04/11
Tell me where you want to go and ill tell you where iv been
how many things can be seen by seeing from within
to other lands I couldn’t touch with my own hands
astral dreaming , wandering in that mystic feeling
flying through the bright midnight
to far off stars by dragon flight
their rainbow scales tell age old tales
of wishing wells and following rainbows
to the end of the tunnel of light
they whisper of these divine sights
showing colours so warm and bright , hues beyond those ever shown
in our reality that delusion has grown
we are limited by our seeing
all the while we are supreme beings
curiously dreaming as the lessons pass by
quietly wondering the reason why
each flower grows to die
without the death of others feeding the earth
there would be no more new birth
each lost has worth
each to come has meaning
through the endless infinity loop
our souls constantly reeling
_______
golden stairway
a steep incline
humbled and open
we dutifully climb
while the ivy grows fast to block our path
and falsehoods infect our most precious facts
remember that nothing is promised
nothing is missing
everything here, is here for a reason
all that your seeing think it over in time
think for yourself
so your self you will remind
___
____
11/26/11
three rows
three lines
jumbled keys
tumbled rhymes
no more time
the constant now
no more ways
to show how
now is the time of believing
without doubts of yesterdays dreaming
tomorrow seeming never to come
day last forever until it is done
like every other one
yet like sustain
things dont stay quite the same
everything does change
as all cycles will pass
if you think its too slow
its probably too fast
though everything truly is right on track
____________
follow the rainbow unending
the constant spiral , rising higher
furthur from earth wind an fire
yet ever closer still
always will be moving away
always will be here to stay
better this way
slowly becoming
something from nothing
___
theres things i wish to say
i dont know where the words go
the rhymes i used to know
the times i used to glow
the embers of becoming
something from nothing
the fires still burn
the phoenix still yearns
to rise ever higher
to be consumed by the very flame
to turn to dust and rise again
the fractal as infinite as the atoms dance
the duality as meaningful as the cosmos romance
father sky an mother earth
each turn of the spiral
the reason for our birth
0 1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21 34 55 89 144 233
yes sometimes
sometimes the numbers remind of a truth so distant
yet never far away
a truth we see each and every day
though we are blind
we see the signs we need to be reminded
the hidden code
in all that shows
secrect symbols left to find
a deeper meaning i cant describe
___
11/28/11
..........................................................
at a loss for words
at times its so absurd what i seem to think
but its as though im always on the brink
ever becoming
the something from nothing
what is the price
the cost of what we sacrifice
faith in a unknown plan
feeling the touch of unseen hands
caring deeply for every man
and every woman
as if their eyes speak the omen
of what we are to become
and what we are running from
back to all one
for good and through ill
our way our will
_____
11/24/11
dont doubt it
let it try
answers a-plenty in the by an by
take some time an let it grow
takes some time to let it show
letting go
lets it flow
an feelin as if its already there
hold the dream to stay aware
thoughts we need
like air we breath in light
we let go of dark
untangle the web
that left us torn apart
broke an stuck
by our own hands
no more cause to pretend
no more denial to defend
all the wounds time will mend
and all the youth years will steal
still as always the love is real
never fade away
somethings beyond us always will stay
to that we must pray
that infinite sway of which the cosmos were birthed
that same force that turns our storms
the spark an fuel that feeds the fires
the humble few
the lessons reviewed
it all makes sense
yet nothing does
somethings gotta move
push has come to shove
like so many times before
how many dove messengers do we need to tell of the light beyond the door
hope reminds so many more are finding the key to the gateway
inside them the safety of which so many have dreamed
though its always seemed out of reach.....
_________
11/22/11
when will time come
i feel the hours getting late
never waiting
always yearning
pushing learning
till i feel its time to run
never knowing whats become
no way of going back to one
but all is showing its whats to come
all the signs an all the symbols
staying home to watch the rain
i am young an life is long
time is on my side today
an then one day i find
the whole years passed behind me
feels like a days passed
an my mind is filled with tumbled rhymes
home
welcome home again
i love being here when i am
feeling light i build a fire
let its embers warm me brighter
far away
across the years
calling from a distant time
draws me closer to the truth of all my years
the past the future
all the same in tumbled rhyme
____________________
how many times has the rain fell this way
how many times has the night took the day
waking to find nothing is lost nor saved
all things eventually must pass by this way
lingering memories, meaning so hard to find
everything seeming connected somehow at all times
the riddled rhymes
the fleeting youth
all of the pathways, never leading to truth
our footprints in the sand are no sign of proof
the tides turning them gently away
seemingly always has been this way
remembering partly, iv been here before
then soon forgetting, as i pass through the door
always becoming, lending myself
something from nothing
the cost of our wealth
_____________
11/20/11
laughing at the devil in all our sin
i know the truth from where iv been
its all within , how many other ways to say
how many stars are outshone by the light of day
so turn on the night , yes
let it shine bright
you are the flame throughout all your change
an you are the waters nourishing growth
this remains my mortal toast to my infinite life
i paid my dues in babylons of ill refute
iv felt as though my life were through
till again i found you
my cosmic twin my divine feminine
i embrace thee my sweet goddess
i anoint thee with the essence of my becoming
we the soul that started from nothing
the void of whats been shows us from how far we have come
so far from undone but spiraling lovingly closer to all one
___
My Starrlight by Derek PsyTalez
my night is cool
my sun is warm
my stars are bright
my love runs deep
through all the waters and ground beneathe our feet
the troubles we keep until they shiver in abandon
as we all are cast away
the timeless battle , ever wanting of more
but never walking through the open door
a love thought too forbidden
the original sins have all been forgiven
all our dark is only what we have been in
and now our lovelight burns strong
loving mother tend me in your arms
only lover grace me with the pleasure of feeling one
inside you i have become my own cherished son
as great as the one in the sky
when i look deep into those beautiful blue eyes
i see the future of our lovings psy
_____
all the hopes gleamed
from all of yesterdays dreams
nothing as it seems
or something as it was
only for a moment
atrophy never was
until it wasnt
then it should be
no one was if no one could be
_____________
11/19/11
[1:11:11 PM]Psy: crossroads... will you ever let him go
i went down to the crossroads an unable to decide
i went down the middle splitting apart my two sides
nothing found nothing lost
left turned on the dark
right turned on the light
now the path escapes my sight
vision blurred from tears of fright
i find myself again
the divine male and feminine
fractured i suture my two sides
asleep and alive
i nuture my awarness
love is the nectar of which there is no bareness
though the world seems so harsh an cold
an somethings really are beyond our control
we neednt fit the forms of our mold
must play our hands before we fold
the memories of old
lessons for the now
it will get better
someway somehow
____________
11/18/11
the reason why never ending
always becoming , something from nothing
goes to show what we figure
knot alot
of scripture of all the words we wrote
who took note
but now the time has come again
my friend till the end
within every hopeless victim
a timeless soul of divine wisdom
wiueeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
___________
11/18.11
we are in the end, what we decide
we our friends or foes
we the wrong or the right
cut down the middle , choosing each side
saying our prayers, cutting our ties
..nowhere to hide..
when its all just one
what is ending
what has begun
cylcing on... an unending spiral
fractaling like never before
though its been higher
so burns the fire
entropy of the energy
with greatest of zeal
sometimes i feel this is all too surreal
each moment that passes
the awe still lasts , this constant obsession
my willing progression
yearning for the truth of all lies
the way to mend the two sides
awake apart , asleep in dark
these pained hearts need reminder of being
our dulled awareness left us blind though still seeing
awake though still dreaming
and i swear these dreams iv dreamed them before
i feel like i came in the out door
looking for that reason why
looking up at the sky i pause and wonder
what lays under, the same as above
the earth our mother, the stars our love
_)))))))((((((((((((((((((
all of the moments , leading to when
all of the omens , signals of them?
those the unknown
the mystery grows
as truth is shown
no sense nonsense
mystical presence
ever becoming
my mind keeps me from running
but noway to run
no where to go
some things you can not un-know
learning slow as time goes
i suppose its the natural cycle
spiraling faster, the faithful disciple ____________
____________________
______________
_____________
____________
__________
________
______
all of the reasons i am led to believe
all of the times i am deceived , the realizations that are let be
what a gift it is just to fight to breathe
nothing needs to be but it all is anyway
everything on the mind but nothing much to say
no words to express
"ineffable" at best
yet someone speaks
and someone tries
the words that fall from the skies
an no one tells me to move on
an no one darkens out my light
so i speak an so i try
to light the fire down inside
calling from a distant time
the echoes of a sunlit hill
where were going
where were from
whats becoming
whats begun
the all one
the seed the tree
becoming to be
from the limbs branching out
realizing connection runs throughout
yet we push further fractaling away
from our one source everyday
moving inevitably towards convergence at last
golden era of peace like those that passed
_________________
11/14/11
walkin down by the river side
its a dusty road, an im rollin light
the rivers long an the rivers wide
it speaks to me as it ripples by
there was a place i used to know
there was too much pain an nothing changed, i had to go
i had to go i had to go it was too much pain thats all i know
my time was through an im moving on
left my home an im holding strong
walk all day an i walk all night
sun gone now, an theres no town in sight, nowhere to sleep nowhere tonight
the stars are out, the night takes the heat
i keep my step to the crickets beat
just a worn coat stretched on my back, and battered boots tied onto my feet
the night is cool , now the winters here
the fires warm , an my thoughts are clear
_____
11/13/11
an if it wasnt, then it wouldnt be
but as it is , its just what we see
or more.. maybe
always the wonder
often the reason
blank slates to find
the cause for our being
ourselves the question
our riddles the seasons
encoded knowledge , placed by divine or hidden to find
or just more patterns , to teach or remind
nothings found nothings lost
each life we live , its own cost
an endless cycle?
like the waves rhyme
back and forth
living and dying
the sun rise
the sun set
may each day be another reset
because tomorrow never is
till its today , just as all the others
here for now , gone again
like another spore tossed in the wind
another seed to flourish again
another self born winter son in spring
all the nature speaking
all the words without a tune
still the glimmer of the moon looms and i know a knowing that cant be known
a knowing that through no words could be shown
and what is the reason
a high grade fax machine used for dry cleaning
a tetrahedron peg forced in round hole
as if seeming beyond my control
at times it gets a lil old , but not as old as time itself
thinking in spirals again i wonder the wealth
from outside looking in to inside looking out
it takes time to know time
an time wounds all heals
just as we are just as we feel
theres always choice, though chaos ensues
another roll of the dice, chose now ... red or blue?
___________
11/13/11
how many open door ways to the mind, i wonder
how many windows are there to find hidden under
always gazing at the works of divine
some higher mind must of designed such utter perfection
each piece of the fractal the same as the whole projection
thoughts keep us guessing
always reflecting
looking deeper out inside
unfolding the layers
reaching furthur for the light
i pause my wonder to take in the sights
and my minds eye gapes
seeing the spiral i await the coming trials
an reflect on those that passed
no pain lasts only love
with its wings i soar above misery and dismay
despair can not reach me no more today
i choose which thoughts win or lose the fight for my mind
though all of my searching, its still myself that i find
my choice to run or hide
my reason to stand still
my thoughts think for something
my faith withholds my will
____________
11/12/11
living the moment
the now is the when
all of the omens
projections of then
the time of believing
the cycles that pass
the days, nights and seasons
its only what were seeing
notice the time is always running behind
natural true rhythm to find
spherical spiral , in and out vibrating higher
like the flame of the minds eye's fire when at one
nestled safely in the lotus of becoming
something started from nothing
soon in 'time' we will see
life is all about 1 2 3
))_____________
11/12/11
when all the sorrows of blighted pain.. creep in your mind
and all of your time seems the endless struggle
the slow sustain, never move forward never look behind
searching for answers so hard to find
turtles all the way down , so they say
hard to explain another way.. a box in a box in a box in a box
or something like a maze or a hall of mirrors where reflection never stops
an illusion of sorts.. created by some unknown or perhaps known force
maybe its usweyoume and separation is a delusion thats grown
pain and misery brings clearity to reality though its hard to define
going through hardships does well to remind , what its like to be treated in kind
your love is mine, we are the same
we are the change , we will remain
the light shines the same in each and every of myself
through our cracks the brightest , the key to our wealth
slumbering wisdom received from divine
awakened feeling more then alive
how many lives have we died
how many seas and how many skies
like all the stars that shine in the night
the endlessness endless as is the light
the light the love inherent since birth
this is the reason we all have self worth
a spark of love from above and evolution cycled on
now its our turn to return to the one
from the spawn we branched apart
learned to conquer and light the dark
all along thriving strong
now the time has come again
to tear apart the walls we built within
stop our sin
the horrid struggle against our brothers
when we are all from the same mother
only one , no other
____________________
11/10/11
tell it to me...
oh the whiskey dont work, please no more for me
id rather take a bit of lsd
ole whiskey gonna make my body dead
oh i drank some good beers , iv tried some rum
but whiskeys the best drink iv ever done
ole whiskey gonna make my body dead
well i drink my whiskey better then any man
a half a fifth a gallon an i still can stand
ole whiskey gonna make my body dead
its burnin holes in every where
now when i swallow pains always there
ole whiskey gonna make my body dead
aint drank in bout a week, lets have a lil fun
had half a pint an im barely numb
the ole whiskey done made my body dead
_)__)_)_)_)_)_)_)_)_)_)_)_
11/05.11
i dont know
i dont want to let it show
it hurts my soul
everyday letting go
i want to know
but everyday it hurts me so
all the things were going through
its time to do what we can do
but i dont know now what to do
i feel my time is really through
i dont know what i can do
and lessons for me
reason to be
all the beauty i still see
though my vision may get blurry
i try my best not to worry
tell myself its just a test
i flood my heart with love leaving no room for regrets
i love her more then can ever be said
love remains even when im dead
even if this is all in my head
i know what i want , not to follow or be led
i think for myself , sometimes too much
but i love my life even though it can be such
a tangled mess , knots i untie without rest
every reason why i just guess
and even if i die now i tried my best
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
that agonizing feeling
cast out alone
isnt that always when our true self is shown
the light of none other shines down our path
should we question of which way we grasp
as if falling in abyss
i find my self calling 'can we stop this'
but it all starts to run
as my mind comes undone
again the pieces falling are saying its one
spiraling out from the all that iv done
an all thats been done to me
just as everything else ... passing by gracefully
____________
11/08/11
all the times lost prophets
what have they found?
grave dust an a eulogy.. where their hope may resound.
a dream of a dream of remembering what it was
that started us , that parted us..
as if appearing from above.
forces shove to control each side
though each man hide
behind the cover of another
while ones still the other
no ones left to part
this disturbed him greatly
from the light he stole the dark
__
11/7/11
so often we talk our selves into knots
as if perspective hasnt gleamed enough
thoughts criss crossing
meaning lost in something undefined
turning a beautiful melody
such as life
into a riddled rhyme
lessons to find in everyday
everyway the light meets my eyes
the cause up to me to define
through the cracks the light shines more
anticipating as i peer through the door
whats the future for?
our decision
what is life for?
its our mission
whatever we decide
the right and wrong
the peace we fight
Jesus Christ
Mother Mary
all that's to love
or to be found scary
all that's unknown
all that's shown
all with reason
every season
every leaf
just as every grain of sand on every beach
in all things, much to teach
listen well
soundless voices cause the spell
that mystic nostalgia we know so well
heaven or hell metaphors for earth
likewise our inner self worth
the inherent karma of our births
nothing comes for free
just as we come with all we need
the love is real will not fade away
just as the dark replaces day
the words the voices say
the meaning hidden in the rivers rhyme
the light will return
all good things in all good time
))))))))))))))))))))))
no say no nothing
everytime i see something i must bite my tongue
feeling numb from all iv done
an all thats one
its too much to bare
how much i care and can not correct whats wrong
not to say i am not strong
i endure what my life is for
the tests and trials theres no denial
i want to rise higher
my minds eye burning the fire of my hearts desire
for now i wait to pass the lessons i now take
_)______
11/05/11
wont something pacify my soul
this need to have control
it gets a little old , watching on helpless as can be
watching destruction waving towards me
back and forth the chaos ensues
takes what it wants to take, whatever good fortune has gifted unto you
my vision quakes , my heart breaks
chance waits for my weakest moment to be saved
faith evaporates as my soul is chilled by the sun
one way or the other its the same for everyone
but we never walk alone , even when only our footsteps are shown
just a test , a path of trial
our choice, acceptance or denial
me a man among men
such a task just to befriend another soul
another reflection of letting go
all the times i used to wish to know the reasons
now i just want comfort through this season
like the change the autumn brings
once green leaves clinging to their trees
turn their colours , fly and spin
going places theyve never been
only to die and rot , food for the next , why?
a marvelous cycle as the winter closes the sky
cold snow an rain blot out the sun
heavy clouds with cool winds now come
hibernation, wondering asleep..
will another spring come to be?
_________________
11/04/11
more words someone some wheres has already heard
maybe written a new way
unique just for the day
everything to say has already been said
everyone alive has already been dead
just like all who sleep must someday wake
its now up to us , our own illusion to break
tear off the veil so many still wear
the need to feel separate
when we are all parts of perfection
and our mere lives are what we must sacrifice
realize life is projection
shed our ego's reflection
let the inner divine shine bright
fill your minds eye with sacred sights
the voices will come when feeling all one
together were strong and shall not depart
spiraling over our one ancient heart
__________
11/04/11
all the doubts that fade you out
truth forced from here from all your fears
when in light there is no fright
the fear unknown the dark now shown
and if you want to see
dont close your eyes..
if you want to stay
dont run to hide..
the evening late the sun go down
soon the dark will all surround.
you hear the voices call again
you know they call out from within ...
if you want to hear
dont block out your mind..
and if you want to know
dont fear what you may find..
no tme to wait the time is now
forced to break this wall somehow .
when i get there then ill know
all will someday soon be shown ...
____
lash your thoughts down
dont make yourself frown
all around at all times
beauty or dismay as far as the eyes can see
and our thoughts even furthur if we dont let our minds be
its all apart of we
every feeling is with reason
years will pass through the seasons
call on the stars light , ask to know why
search for answers dont let the truth hide
and we may never know
seeking without expecting
holding what we are letting go
this life but a gift, every day or nothing is
if nothing is , nothing was
then nothing will be
not this maybe
maybe not
these thoughts dont stop
this and that , distract distract
its got the feeling but not exact
more or less , "enough" always a guess
but it never is
hopes are found let down to find surprise gifts
lifes twists
no stopping this the ebb and flow
cant take hold while letting go
all the truth you seek to know
but what ever is
all of it a guess , just like this
and we may wonder all we like
at the end of the day its still just life
_____________________
10/31/11
how far can i turn a blind eye today
are there any answers if we leave the questions lay at rest
oh i wonder are there answers if we leave the questions at rest
is our faith only a guess
never knowing yet believing life is love
as we are feeling must not be dreaming
it feels so real though it seems so surreal
far from these countries and worry
a new day will rise from the old
and though this visions still blurry
i know it will come true just as sure as its been told
say i know it will come true just as sure as its been told
never to wonder the hurry
the madness i have to let it be
oh if not ill be thrown into sadness
and that way just is not for me
said that way just is not for me
_______________
the meek shall inherit the earth
when only the strong survive
The weak will go on living, when all the others die
trying to fight to survive, taking each others lives over a patch of land
to make one rich man millions must suffer for him
all the while that mans no different from the others
the weak shall discover that they are the many
all together their power is plenty
___________
we give all power , in every way
on every day, its all in our heads
or out of our minds, transmitted from divine
all around at all times... a floating web of grand design
connecting all , the energy flow
as all is one there is no where for it to go
but back and forth endlessly
reflected progressively
spiraling brighter all of the time
as the moon changes in rise and decline
the wax and wane like the waves and leaves that lap and change
natures rhythm the same as the end is the beginning
once more the door is a window
the window a mirror
only to see clearer , the hall of reflections
cosmic self, endless projection
_________
no one seems to know
an no one seems to care
it doesnt seem to matter if no one is aware
if there is no truth there aint nothing to lose
i guess its just our faith to choose
whats the use of denying or relaying
on faiths that may never resound the truth were hoping to find in
an endless maze the calling destine to craze our illusion of reality
tearing apart all around me all the things i do and dont see
all the layers with no room for nay-sayers
faith is true but with it i know not what to do
i give my love i fill my heart with the light from above
i do my part the best i can
even if i am only a man
_______________
10/29/11
from the only... time that matters
holding you my only... the one that matters
remembering me lonely... lost and scattered
now that i have you, i cant go back there
i dont want whats out there
i cherish what we have here
my desire has never been ever more clear
my content has never been so so complete
you are the all that i ever do need
i need your love for a reason to breathe
alone im just another soul lost in lifes sea
____________
what have say ye
of all the balance of inequality
is it ever so perfect
is it really truly worth it
may we wait?
where is our break?
its time to change?!
can we stay the same?!
oh no, cant wait
its time, no time..
no time to change!
why is life like this
why is god above this
why... i dont know i sigh
no more reasons
accept what your seeing
its just another day
made to pass another way
___________
life is hard, yea life is tough
i try my best while its getting rough
every day in every way
theres still some things ... i just cant say
i try so hard , so hard to bare
this isnt fun , this isnt fair
time is short, it never waits
till its gone, an your at the gates
so say your piece
your time is through
what have you done
what did you do
now answer me , how does it matter
life is through , what have you gathered?
iv paid my dues, iv tried my best
time is gone, where is the rest?!
ohhh i cant complain..
iv had some fun, i am not the same
now im done
ohhh i cant complain..
iv found divine, i found the beauty
by losing my mind
_______________
id have to say i wish there were another way
but its so far off, could it happen here today?
only if we did it together but people i know better
all the while bad apples in the bunch
all along the reason was us
freewill led to deceit and mistrust
separating us, when we are all from one tree
now theres so much entropy to see
we could stop it maybe , but is it too late
the new earth wont wait.. time gone for idle wonder
door keeps opening wider for all to discover
there will soon be no turning away
the light will shine through those that keep it at bay
there is no darkness that can hide you from yourself
inevitably the divine truth will burn through
the one cosmic self
+__
cant just smile a the spirals of untimely wealth
the militant rivals of sickness in health
the cosmic self
a planet a star a moon
there you are
mass leads to gravity
thoughts breed reality
projected duality
imaginations of time
was i ever here before?
no answers, more rhymes
spilling light of divine races through my mind
just like every other time here i am
back within where iv been
the cosmic self
the cosmic twin
all is reflection
i know it within
infinite projection
from a rain drop to the cosmos at spin
______________________________________
so as not to wonder
i will wait awhile
thoughts cause minds to plunder hopes and faith
lost replaced with doubts that waste, that spoil
like gears that toil , any fear a wrench in the works
from our minds we may not divorce
must control the force
with great power much responsibility indeed
our thoughts may flow
our thoughts may ebb
fill the dark of inner dread with light of love that never ends
you are your friend the best friend indeed
you are everything you need
you are the one , you are the other
love each other, theres no starting over
in this time of 3 6 9
we will remind, the power of 12
the perfection , ourselves
heaven or hell in the 7's endless spells
fractaling away all the 2's 4's and 6's of the day
into the one the 12 of the sun
from these pyramids so mysterious
a soundless voice is calling to us
our thoughts do become us
but how much is mine
and how much divine
wondering at times if theres separation at all
realizations that fall,
one to the next theres always more yet
no solid truth , evasive reasons
feelings of eternal youth through all ill age
thoughts hazed by understanding
not withstanding tests of time
for now im fine
have i ever been before?
somethings trying to pull me
to the other side through the door
________________
somedays i just dont understand
whats the big idea the grand master plan
i see the signs , i weaken and climb
up and down like stairs that wind into one another
always more to discover.. i start to wonder
is there any escape to this endless maze
my logic crazes out of reason
feeling the spiral , my body seizing to be
not just me
but the many
The one
The plenty
falling into the one
i start to notice what iv done
clearly.. i, the maker , the made
it is always up to me to change
so whats with reflection
is this a hall of mirrors or some divine projection
seeming perfection seeing the chaos as it is
the end of bliss
entropy at long last
just as the now shall be the past
_______________________
10-25-11
i want to modulate my receptors
i want to dominate my projector
strip away ego's residues
cleanse the mirror of inner truth
observing reflection i open wide
behind the veil that logic hides
no more time left to remind
all is one the spiral is nearing done
into infinity, all our lifetimes amounting to continuity
--------------------------------------
laying on the flame heated rock
gazing in the fire at impossible square knots
gently unfolding, visions of knowing
concepts so vast words may not even grasp
the balanced weight of the ideals, flashing in familiar symbols surreal
no contact , out of touch.. with the body robotic gazing backwards at the view
feeling the me in myself looking at my body as another you
as we are each other, myself is no other
feeling the all one permeate my being
i trust the faith knowing from seeing
returning again the cosmos at spin
body regained though something has changed..
_______________________________________
i want to light the fire
i want to burn it again
I want the fire brighter
i light the flame from within
gentle i spark the tinder
wading in at long last
better not to dive under, swift undertow moving past
quiet now i wonder
whats to gain from all thats changed
the pieces found in the puzzle ever spot a piece the same
now everything is clear to see but not to look ahead but just around me
the light has found me
i have found it
i am unity itself
half and half no longer split
___________________
from the outside
looking in
find myself in all the eyes i have ever seen
why the wonder of this life
i pay the price of strife and sacrifice
for all the vastness that iv glimpsed
like the wind at night is brisk
and the moon that glows with it
a gentle rolling wave
cools and calms my soul to save
the dark in day has come to pass
an will see light again at last
like the new born rising sun
shining down for all one
outside is inside when we remember where we have been
outside is inside when we remember where we have been
always ending in the beginning again
reborn new life now learn the price so grow like new gears in the device
keep the wheels turning keep the soul yearning
our minds designed for learning
our bodies burning the energy as the worlds turning
the mind cycles on
growing more strong
the way of becoming
thought controls numbing our possibility
they may control only if we let their will be
my thoughts become me
i am myself
we are each other and need work together
for humanities health
__________
yea i like to believe it
at times my thoughts let me see it
no words to describe you just gotta feel it
that inner touch that grace of love
that kind that surrounds from the stars above
as well as within
the timelessness youve always been
the inner triangle of primal power
the lines of divinity the pyramids that tower
housing truth in symbolic form
many the sides as lessons we learned
as our thoughts burn our bodies grow lax
forgetting the present the future the past
feeling the now the endless moment
divining truth through hidden omens
iv been this before over and over
the same month of october yet moving closer
the spiral of life i swing with delight as well as in pain
i am myself through all that iv changed
______________
running through the running through the
night
running through the running through the
night
forever forever chasing light
forever forever chasing light
when will we get there
life can only be fair
wonder when we'll get there
life can only be fair
all the time i know the truth is there
all the signs force to take care
never knowing
thoughts growing
the end beginning again
cyclic nature becoming greater
changes waver thoughts of the savior
so due in time
the waves that hush the wind in rhyme
why the visitor has never questioned
for each mistake an equal lesson
thoughts consume the mind in rough hewn lines
fuzzing logic causing the body to become robotic
then you wonder from where you came
the all one source within the brain a cosmic receiver
downloading knowledge into the believer
transcendent waves of unnamed blazes of colours
crazing vision of the truth
the endless fountain of endless youth
our thoughts reborn in other forms
_____________________
10/21/11
run to the river, let it call us to the sea
where we may find some comfort, possibly
under the rainbow where my love lay
all of tomorrow mixed with today
gentle the rhythm calls out to me
graces my fingers with long lost memory
now is the time that always has been
release hold and let your love pour in
its only a dream if nothings as it seems
how are we here and where have we been
where are we going, will we be let in
all this time spent wondering
many the way of becoming
many the parts, many the cycles
all with reason, all that we fight through
the striving to be
the yearning to see
life a chance we behold
as each of our stories unfold
each setting sun rising as one
through the doubts, loss an pain
brings light to wonder, the unbroken chain
everything just as should be
including you inside of we
_____________________
TERRAPIN
of all these words our sorrows plight
the dark begins to fade the light
when our madness reigns supreme
and our life it seems a dream
trust in faith inside we dwell
a light no shadows dark shall dispel
the fires glow grows faint again
an empty feeling spilling in
only love can fill that hole
its up to us to keep control
why we wonder of this light
why the darkness tries to fight
all the answers are within
of the truth we've always been
its all with reason and something looms
it is our glory not our doom
_____________________________
10/19/11
i am different because i am the same
i am myself through all that iv changed
growth an learning remains the constant goal
still at times i lose the will to self control
letting go taking hold
hiding the pain so nobody knows
caring for others beyond my self
healing within for greater self wealth
seeing the light in darkness of night, the moon a dry mirror in the sky
reflecting the light from the divine
knowing myself as you and i , i bless our hearts
together we are better and shall not depart
we mustnt fracture without each other our lives scatter
into a fractal of suffering pain
only together can we change
must refrain from letting go
always trusting though we never know
time is slow as its fast
nows today till its passed
like the cycle of a tree
our souls the roots our lives the leaves
to spring to life, buds that burst to bloom
always knowing, to die and fall is our doom
our thoughts looming, we cherish our seed
knowing that someday they will be more trees
just like these only better
with our blessings i know they will get there
____________________
i want to write but cant force the flow
letting go i wonder why
till my minds silence i break with a sigh
what do i even want to rhyme
another waste of time? written another way..
sometimes in silence i miss what the voices say |
mind blank thoughts sank down beneathe the realm of reason
learning the cause of every feeling
cosmos reeling ... no it can never stop awhile
may not pause an lay idle
life just tends to be always slipping away from me
or i to it?
if i were to step would i get stuck or would i slip
never mind the bullshit let us get this show on the road
my thoughts have grown far out of control
but i guess thats the reason for my mold
same old rhymes that never get old
so many ways to fashion a rhyme
so many ways to dispel your time
ooooohh all the wonder
what is the point
for now i wait
whos got a joint?
_______________
theres just no way it always fades
whats come to pass it never lasts
and never could, at least thats how it seems
as if life were but a fleeting dream
i say what i mean but does it come through
all the meaning i want to express to you
running through my mind like the sands of time
always more to find then whats been left behind
the journey towards more
exploring the open door
i feel my soul break the constraints of my mold
awareness of body slowly letting go
drifting to know
i see the rainbow flowers the golden hallways of timeless valor
i hear the distant call the angels singing for one in all
playing sweetly a mandolin comes to soothe my soul again
cascading sound coats and surrounds
the time is now
and always has been
even a saint knee deep in sin
every cause has a reason alike
every shadow is partly of light
wrong is right in this old routine
clearly life is more then what it seems
now i dont say there is only one way
or only one path
it may all lead to the same place at long last
or perhaps we fractal away
what is the truth? i never can say
each wonder only a guess
despite what surrounds i wonder the rest
seeing that triforce design in my mind
another reflection of inner divine
what does it mean to glimpse those pearl stairs
the halos of angels circling the air
the winged ones gaze down with care
flashing fractured light signals im there
but where is there?
tho the questions never answered
im just reminded in time ill get there
but where is there?
or while im at it where is here?
too much to know the cause of fear
wondering the unknown that may never be shown
my wonder has grown i can hardly contain
wanting the truth i can barely refrain
i have to ask why i want to know now
slipping away i forgot to ask how
________
on the way, its hard to say where
most the time i try not to care
for if we wonder do we wander blind
what may we lose what may we find
eleven thousand rainbows dancing colours in the sky
all this timeless beauty with all the reason to ask why
so all the time i cant decide
the rhymes the reason
nothing seeming out of place
all the words i cant replace
slipping by so fast theres no time to waste when wondering why
so many times the wonder turns runs and hides
but truth never lies even when it does
if im not the one then nobody ever was
by that i mean this isnt some kind of dream
were all the one its so complete
the way is there its our job to reach
_________________________________________________
10/16/11
im fucked, i should of thought about it enough or took the time to listen
now somethings missing, time passes day to day pain attacks in every way
never may go away but i still have hope for today
why the pain without end why the trials to have a friend
knowing love can mend we try our best still enslaved to daily tests
hope remains the daily faith which no doubt can replace but its all around
in a seamless ocean of light we are the sound
manifestations of divine being
there is a cause for all we are feeling
living dreaming its all in our heads
all in our minds awake asleep or dead
the cosmic knowledge on which i fed
i let it into my head from the light of our sun
shines the light of the one
eyes closed looking towards the middle forehead
to the center triforce , let the visions flash but do not let them dazzle you to a lull
appreciate their beauty and give thanks then let your intentions be known ,
feel your body let go feel your soul rise
breathe in light let it permeate
immerse your soul in love
___________
10/16/11 (Channeled eyes closed meditive typin)
we all just want a change but what remains if nothing stays the same who will be saved? not the maker nor the made, the inevitable fade... but does it have to be that way? no one knew cause no one thought but are there answers? not alot... dont go nor stop? then no wonder theres more then less to discover no answers but riddles a chiropractor on a fiddle, a baker made to riddle... the mechanic mellow dramatic, another one of the same old stories that never was so no reason to worry as it never will be again, the beginning is the end.. cut roll the credits, show the previews now dont forget it the time will come again.. new loss new friend. were all each other behind dark eyes mesmerized by the unknowing, thoughts of self growing into becoming, the other sides numbing has now come to pass the numb didnt last.. life stinging through every me is every you. lessons all through every ones day to day, we are made this way.. its all for our learning as the cosmic wheels continue turning we must make the best of the time we have here.. do our part to help the others and make our faith clear. the truth is near an the future is now, there is no more time left to question how we simply must do.. only together can we make it through as now is the time like never before... soon all will witness the meaning of christ shown through the door
10/16/1
soul ascension, body of light activation
thats the goal of all of creation?
or perhaps we are just as the ants
or they are just as we are
rearranged particles of some exploded star...
lessons for knowing in everything showing
so perhaps we are here to learn through our fear
love of light keeps me here despite all the trails there may be no denials
life is a gift and my riddle to solve
never again will i build up the walls
my love is worth growing
my cups overflowing
i spill my sweet waters on all open shores
i know my loving is what im here for
i nurture the weary, those that cant walk i carry
for those that cant talk i speak
for those that cant ask i reach
as if i were every man i smile calmly an shake their hand
the way to be shines within
transmute to light all of your sin
______________
to love another we must love the self
to realize reflection is to see inner wealth
no longer comparing this one to that, realizing instead theres no separation in fact
all things keep coming back to we are all one
we need to come together rather then undone
lifes not always having fun but learning right from wrong
who we are is what we've been through not from where we've come
looking through a mirror we are meant to see clearer
all we are is all we let us be
and all we want is all we let us see
_______________________
as if a mirror on the wall
there you are
the life you knew the words you wrote
your battered shoes and worn-in coat
you say you have the way in scripture
to paint a picture so divine
we draw with interlocking circles and connecting lines
that curve behind the hidden seams
so nothing seems out of place
no mistakes
life just is a lil over dramatic
at least its not lost in the attic
on the wall of every home
in every mind creative thoughts grown
the constant wondering, thinking outside the lines
the cookie cutter designed lives we live, cultivate to give
waste all that which we can replace
just for another taste
its a common theme, a timeless daydream
yet so obscene, the mindless self indulgence routine
nothing seems to be the way it oughta be
not that i know what that would be
seems at times the whole universe might close ontop of me
or at least i feel the weight.. much too great for my mind
as i approach the soul divine, it sends me reeling
cursing and feeling the limits of my mold, which i control
though i tumble down the hill i return to climb and always will
the energy moves through we and i must guide it
while i see others battle to control or hide it
i shall not cower i know our power
from no lesson will my soul break
there is no test that is too great
everything to say has been said
everything to write has been read
the all one source within our head
unlimited knowledge on which we fed
the forbidden fruit that stems so sweetly from the root
on earth our tree provides all we need
the fruit shows all but helps man build walls
the knowing made us have to keep from showing the isness the suchness of life
we have become so distant while still so near to our plight
let in the light let your love grow
there is no danger to the darkness that the light does now show
all with reason all things balance
the mind a kingdom
the earth a palace
_____
10/15/11
so we dont wonder
now let us wait
for the time of becoming
to be made first we must break
but to every moment we do relate
all things with reason
like the variance of the seasons
all things seeming to be right on track
long forgotten knowledge keeps flooding back
many times before i have walked through the door
total reflection on both sides
yet all things different as the truth does like to hide
but only to remind the truth is worth seeing
wondering always the cause of our being
_)))))))
creative thought, the kingdom within every mind
in every one of us, untold wonder there to find.
no words nor rhymes can even approach...
the divine wisdom no words have yet wrote,
but only caught a glimmer of the shine
hidden within every one of us in time
the answer will show
slowly becoming, what we still dont know
_____________
one day i realized its up to me
and i was so thankful to be allowed to see
the perfection around me as unbalanced as it may seem
often takes on the wonder like the beauty of a dream
like every fading scene, change will pass away each theme
the endless spiral which we ride
a body to serve a soul
the self denies control
choose ascension beyond our molds
break restraints of thought controls
you are divine
its up to you
your thoughts or mine
_______________
10/12/11
the empty space, far left behind
leaving letters of words, old broken rhymes
the silence pervaded, my thoughts have been taken..
down through the earth, i let my soul flow
to the roots of life i used to know..
such is the hill i tumble up slow, slipping still
maybe i always will, as i reach that top silvery peak
i fall back away from the freedom i seek.
not to be discouraged, i still see the sight
the glory to be, is still worth the fight
_____________
10/12/11
life a beach the far side so many try to reach
but never do question the sand on which they stand
just like the sand here i am, stretched before me an behind
a billion particles of stardust to find.. to mesmerize
as they slip across my feet, i realize each parts unique
though equal to the whole.. like myself who i teach
the very many me's in all of you i try to reach
my voice speaks in many ways
in all the things that all of us say
and even words unsaid, sometimes read in numbers or signs
always does show the hidden divine left here to find
life is a riddle an after all the answers all mine
so i do wonder with lifetimes of time
__________
the clocks tick
the gears click
the keys unlock
the shows stop
the body rocks
the stomach knots
the mind unwinds
across reels of time
spirals unfolding
releasing the knowing
showing the open
the whole of the picture
the meaning of scripture
the cost that will be
the future we will see
all to our choosing
all for our using
and losing
for what is lost
was only found
everyday the earth turns round
nothing lost and nothing remains
day by day we are the change